The 34-year-old explains that he was \u201cfortunate to inherit some money from my grandfather,” who wanted him to use the funds “to buy a house.”<\/p>\n
The poster notes that he is very “grateful” to have been given the “life-changing amount of money,” about \u00a3450,000 (or $600,000).<\/p>\n
He and his 29-year-old girlfriend found a rural cottage with a “half-converted” stone barn, and have been dreaming about building their future there.<\/p>\n
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The home requires some work to make the annex livable, but he sees real opportunity in it. \u201cIt just needs a small kitchen and bathroom put in before it would be ready to rent,\u201d he says, sharing that the plan is to generate income from the space.<\/p>\n
He carefully ran the numbers for their new life together and, according to his calculations, \u201cbills, council tax, insurance, utilities, heating, food pets come to about 1200 gbp a month” \u2014 or around $1,600.<\/p>\n
The man admits that his expectation is for both of them to contribute equally once they are settled. \u201cI would want my gf to contribute half towards that when we are settled say within 2 or 3 years time,\u201d he explains.<\/p>\n
At the same time, he makes clear that any rental income would help reduce her financial burden. \u201cIf we made 600 in a month, she would pay 0 for her side,\u201d he writes, noting that if the income covered everything, \u201cwe’d both pay 0 and anything extra split equally or decide what to do with it.\u201d<\/p>\n
He emphasizes that he is not asking his partner to shoulder responsibility for the property itself. \u201cI don’t expect her to cover any maintenance costs or any costs towards the house upgrades furniture etc I’ll cover all that,\u201d he assures.<\/p>\n
For now, he has been covering all expenses while she looks for stability. \u201cUntil that time that she’s got a stable job, I’d keep covering all our expenses as I am doing now and have done for most of our relationship,\u201d he shares.<\/p>\n
Despite a solid salary, much of his income goes elsewhere. \u201cI have to pay around 40 percent of my wage on personal therapy as part of my own training and also treatment,\u201d he admits.<\/p>\n
His girlfriend, meanwhile, comes from a very different financial background. \u201cMy girlfriend has no money at all and uninterested family and will likely receive no inheritance maybe 20k max,\u201d he explains.<\/p>\n
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He insists his vision is about creating balance and joy, not endless work. \u201cMy reasoning is this house will allow us both the chance to have an amazing life, but I don’t want to work all hours and keep damaging my health,\u201d he writes.<\/p>\n
His dream is a slower pace, with shared responsibilities and freedom. \u201cMy vision is we would both work 2 or 3 days a week, maybe do fostering, and rent the annexe which would allow us to cover our costs and enjoy the house and our life together,\u201d he says.<\/p>\n
The couple has agreed on the house, though tensions remain about what comes next. \u201cTldr my girlfriend is worried because she thinks 600 gbp per month (half our expenses) is unfair,\u201d he confesses.<\/p>\n
They have already been together for five years and are actively working on their relationship. \u201cWe’ve been together 5 years and are in couples therapy,\u201d he explains.<\/p>\n
He acknowledges that some men would fully support their partner and admits he has considered it. \u201cI am open that my view might be wrong, I understand many guys would just support 100 financially and I would do that if my health was better,\u201d he reflects.<\/p>\n
But his girlfriend points out an imbalance in the plan. \u201cMy partner says it’s unfair and that I should mention she would only be able to earn minimum wage,\u201d he writes, noting that her take-home pay would be far lower than his.<\/p>\n
\u201cI also really don’t want her to work full time or shift work because it would spoil the lifestyle element for me,\u201d he admits, though he wonders aloud, \u201cso maybe that’s me being controlling?\u201d<\/p>\n
Still, he insists his intentions are about enjoying life together rather than endless labor. \u201cI just think what’s the point of having such a nice house and land if we aren’t gonna enjoy it as a lifestyle,\u201d he explains.<\/p>\n
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He emphasizes that he would be supportive if she wanted to pursue more. \u201cI’d of course support all her expenses if she decided she wants to study or train to get a better paid job,\u201d he adds.<\/p>\n
As responses pour in, he thanks the community for their advice and perspectives. \u201cThank you for all the replies,\u201d he writes.<\/p>\n
He clarifies that the house will remain in his name, though he envisions her gaining some security from savings. \u201cThe idea is from her work and income from the annexe, even paying towards her half of expenses, she would be able to save each month to give her more financial security,\u201d he explains.<\/p>\n
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He reassures her about her safety in the relationship, though he acknowledges the limits of his promise. \u201cI have promised her she would always have a place to stay and food even if we broke up, if she needed\/wanted that, but I know that is not the same as the house being in her name or a legal protection,\u201d he admits.<\/p>\n