{"id":222993,"date":"2025-10-24T16:04:09","date_gmt":"2025-10-24T16:04:09","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/uk\/222993\/"},"modified":"2025-10-24T16:04:09","modified_gmt":"2025-10-24T16:04:09","slug":"this-is-what-i-want-to-do-this-is-what-has-saved-me-the-irish-times","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/uk\/222993\/","title":{"rendered":"\u2018This is what I want to do. This is what has saved me\u2019 \u2013 The Irish Times"},"content":{"rendered":"

\u201cI\u2019ve had a year of living somewhat normal,\u201d says Kellie Harrington<\/a>, stirring her coffee on the North Strand. \u201cAnd normal is not for me. It\u2019s just not for me, for now.\u201d<\/p>\n

In a nutshell, that\u2019s all there is to it. When it comes right down to it, Ireland\u2019s two-time Olympic gold medallist<\/a> isn\u2019t done being a boxer. She said she was. She maybe even thought she was. Paris was definitely supposed to be the end. Now, it turns out, it wasn\u2019t. <\/p>\n

\u201cEvery fight I have, I put so much pressure on myself. I can\u2019t wait to fight \u2013 and then, come three, four weeks before the fight, I\u2019m wondering why I do it. \u2018Why am I still here? What the hell am I at?\u2019<\/p>\n

\u201cAnd I suppose then after the Olympics, I just announced my retirement. But that\u2019s the good thing about life, we\u2019re allowed to make our minds up, we\u2019re allowed to change them again and make it back up and change it again. <\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019ll be 36 in December. So, why not? I\u2019m saying nothing about the [next] Olympics or anything like that. Everybody knows me. I\u2019ll never say anything about winning or going to the Olympics. I always look at one fight at a time, one competition at a time. And that\u2019s exactly what I\u2019m doing. <\/p>\n

\u201cBut I do just think, imagine if I didn\u2019t give it another go. I\u2019m fit, I\u2019m kind of healthy. I have a few niggles at the moment but in general I\u2019m healthy. So why wouldn\u2019t I?\u201d<\/p>\n

Harrington is going to fight in the Nationals in January. She has a couple of kilos to shed before then to get down to her 60kg fighting weight so there\u2019ll be a purge of sugar products from the house over the coming weeks and months. Her first time back in the ring will be on December 2nd, with a night of exhibition boxing in the Round Room in the Mansion House, a special place for her ever since she was awarded the Freedom of the City there in 2022. Baby steps.<\/p>\n

\"Two-timeTwo-time Olympic gold medallist Kellie Harrington. Photograph: Leon Farrell\/Photocall Ireland <\/p>\n

\u201cI have people saying, \u2018Oh, but your legacy.\u2019 And I\u2019m like, \u2018Legacy is what you make it.\u2019 I have two Olympic gold medals. I\u2019m the only female in Ireland to have gold medals from two different Olympics. And the only Irish Olympian with two gold medals in boxing. So no matter what, I\u2019ve already won, you know?<\/p>\n

\u201cAnd I think there\u2019s a lesson in it for me. If I step into the ring and I lose a fight, it\u2019s fine because nobody has died. I\u2019ll get out and I\u2019ll still hopefully be healthy and it\u2019s only a loss. The reason why I\u2019m stepping back in is because I enjoy it. I enjoy moving, I enjoy sparring, I enjoy learning something new every day about boxing. And I don\u2019t necessarily enjoy learning something new every day outside of boxing. Boxing is where I enjoy it. So why wouldn\u2019t I do it?\u201d<\/p>\n

There was no big reveal. No moment of clarity that turned the retirement ship around. She came home from Paris with a second gold medal around her neck<\/a> and within three or four weeks of everything dying down, she found herself back out at the Sport Ireland Institute in Abbotstown. Not doing a lot, really. But not doing nothing either. <\/p>\n

And that\u2019s how it has been for much of the past 14 months. She does a lot of her training with her club coach Noel Burke anyway and so she has tipped away in St Mary\u2019s in Tallaght. She\u2019s been in and around the High Performance Unit on and off, sparring with Zara Breslin, the young Waterford fighter who won the Irish 60kg title in her absence and fought in last month\u2019s World Championships in Liverpool. Retirement was something she said, more so than something she did. <\/p>\n

\"KellieKellie Harrington celebrates after beating Brazil’s Beatriz Ferreira to reach the women’s 60kg final at the Paris Olympics. Photograph: Ryan Byrne\/Inpho <\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019ve had more than a year and I\u2019ve had time to reflect on why I actually started boxing in the first place,\u201d says Harrington. \u201cIt was to get me out of the hole, the wrong road that I was going down. And I\u2019ve had time to reminisce on how I felt when I started boxing first and how I want that feeling again. <\/p>\n

\u201cI know that sounds mad because I\u2019ll be 36 in December. But it\u2019s being a part of something. And I don\u2019t want to be a part of anything else. Everybody says, \u2018Oh, but you could do this and that. You could go to Timbuktu.\u2019 And I\u2019m like, \u2018Timbuktu is too far away for me.\u2019 I\u2019m here and this is what I want to do. This is what has saved me<\/a>. And thanks be to god, I don\u2019t need saving any more. But I enjoy it. And I still feel like I have more to give back.\u201d<\/p>\n

[\u00a0Sportswoman of the Year awards as it happened: Kellie Harrington named winner for 2024Opens in new window<\/a>\u00a0]<\/p>\n

Still, it\u2019s one thing keeping your hand in. It\u2019s another to decide that you\u2019re stepping out of the twilight and actually suiting up again. If she was going to do it for real, there had to come a reckoning. Which meant she had to sit down with her wife, Mandy Loughlin. <\/p>\n

\u201cI think Mandy always knew as well that I was going to go back. But there had to be a point where I had to officially say, \u2018Right, it\u2019s happening.\u2019 And when I told Mandy, she says, \u2018Look, I\u2019m obviously not happy. I don\u2019t want you to go back.\u2019 And I was like, I was just speechless looking at her. Then I was like, \u2018Why?\u2019 She says, \u2018Because you\u2019re not the easiest person to live with when you\u2019re in it.\u2019\u201d<\/p>\n

It\u2019s not that she was worried for your safety?<\/p>\n

\u201cNo, no, no, nothing like that. It\u2019s just like, \u2018Yeah, you\u2019re not the easiest person to live with when you\u2019re in preparation mode and you\u2019re fully focused.\u2019 And she\u2019s right! I\u2019m not. There\u2019s no doubt about that.<\/p>\n

\"KellieKellie Harrington with her wife Mandy after the medal ceremony at the Paris Games. Photograph: James Crombie\/Inpho <\/p>\n

\u201cSo we kind of talked and I was like, \u2018This is different. This is not\u2026\u2019 Well, it\u2019s different until it\u2019s not different, I suppose! But I\u2019m doing it because I want to do it. I\u2019m just happy. When I start getting ratty, then we\u2019ll reassess the situation. <\/p>\n

\u201cBut she also said she\u2019d support me and everything. And if Mandy didn\u2019t support me, then I wouldn\u2019t be doing it. Because you can\u2019t. I couldn\u2019t do this without Mandy. It\u2019s impossible. If you don\u2019t have somebody there \u2013 your partner, your wife, your husband, whoever \u2013 backing you the whole way, then who else is going to back you?\u201d<\/p>\n

This isn\u2019t about the Olympics in Los Angeles in 2028. Not yet, anyway. For now, it\u2019s about the Mansion House in December and the National Stadium in January. But equally, it would be silly to pretend that LA isn\u2019t in the conversation. If Harrington wins her 12th national title early in 2026, she\u2019ll start thinking about next steps. And next, and next, and next. It doesn\u2019t take much prompting for her to start laying it out.<\/p>\n

[\u00a0Kellie Harrington the gem of Diamond Park as crowd roars on their double Olympic championOpens in new window<\/a>\u00a0]<\/p>\n

\u201cIt\u2019s all small steps,\u201d she says. \u201cAnd small steps before the biggest step of them all. The biggest step is the qualifiers in 2027, in Istanbul in Turkey, probably in July. Not thinking too far ahead or anything! But that\u2019s only a blink of an eye away really. And look, it could be all over by January anyway. <\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019ll never look past the Nationals because anything can happen. And we have got some great girls coming through. Even talking about Istanbul, they\u2019re longer goals. I know it\u2019s only, you blink your eyes and you\u2019re there. But I\u2019ll go to Nationals, play it by ear, see what happens. And if it happens that I\u2019m out, then I\u2019m out.\u201d<\/p>\n

She went to the World Championships last month. And not as an idle bystander and not as a supporter. She brought her kit bag and her gloves and found herself a sparring partner and they had a good old dance together. She\u2019s not in bad shape but she\u2019s not in boxing shape either. So when she faced off against the Indian entrant in the 60kg weight class, she soon knew all about it.<\/p>\n

\u201cI hadn\u2019t had a proper competitive spar since Paris. And we had three belter rounds, proper sparring now. It was class. It was great. But I was sick for the day after it. I went over on a 4am flight, had a bit of breakfast and then sparred the three rounds. She was there competing so she was in serious shape. It was a mad thing to do. But I really enjoyed it.\u201d<\/p>\n

\"KellieKellie Harrington celebrates with coach Zaur Antia after winning gold in Paris. Photograph: Ryan Byrne\/Inpho <\/p>\n

This is the nub of it. Kellie Harrington loves boxing. She loves the insanity of it. It scares her and it thrills her. She will live a long life without it \u2013 you can\u2019t box in the amateurs once you turn 40 \u2013 so that simplifies everything for her. Now is all she has.<\/p>\n

\u201cIt\u2019s living,\u201d she says, simply. \u201cIt might be living in complete chaos, but maybe that\u2019s what gets me up in the morning. I\u2019m very dramatic with absolutely everything I do. I\u2019m the most emotional person you\u2019ll probably ever meet. If I\u2019m driving and I see a person walking a dog and the dog is old, I\u2019ll start crying. Like, I am so emotional. <\/p>\n

\u201cWhat I miss the most about boxing is the emotional side of it. You\u2019re warming up for a final, you\u2019re probably the last person in the competition from the team. All the coaches are there. And the shit that\u2019s going through your mind, knowing that they\u2019re feeling the same thing that you\u2019re feeling. But you\u2019re also thinking, \u2018They\u2019re not the ones getting punched in the face!\u2019 <\/p>\n

\u201cIt\u2019s me that\u2019s going to do this. They can only carry me so much. And then it\u2019s me on my own. And you\u2019re shitting yourself but then you\u2019re parking it and you\u2019re as brave as anything. Then you\u2019re shitting yourself again, then you\u2019re parking it again. And you\u2019re walking around going, \u2018I\u2019m here, I\u2019m going to get in, I\u2019m going to give it what I have.\u2019 <\/p>\n

\u201cIt\u2019s the madness of those moments before a fight that I miss. Looking at all the coaches, the physio, the doctor, anyone from your team who\u2019s there and you don\u2019t have to say a word to them. You just look at them and you laugh because you\u2019re like, \u2018How crazy is this? Who would do this?\u2019 <\/p>\n

\"KellieKellie Harrington speaking at the PE Expo 2025. Photograph: David Fitzgerald\/Sportsfile <\/p>\n

\u201cNobody. Nobody would. You have to be mentally strong. I\u2019m mentally very strong in that way, in that scenario. But outside of that, I\u2019m not that mentally strong, probably. I\u2019m very emotional. But in there, in that moment, I think that\u2019s what maybe separates me from the rest.\u201d<\/p>\n

So on she goes. She doesn\u2019t know where it will lead or where it will bring her or where it will end. But she\u2019s in it now, full-bore. Suggest to her that it\u2019s a way of staving off real life for another while yet and she bristles ever so slightly.<\/p>\n

\u201cI know what you\u2019re saying, right. I know what you\u2019re saying about real life and stuff. But what is real life? This is my life. I\u2019m very happy with this being my life and I\u2019m very comfortable with it. <\/p>\n

\u201cAnd like people say, what do you want to be when you grow up? I\u2019m like, I am grown up. This is me. I enjoy doing what I do and at most I can do it till I\u2019m 40. If everything goes to the plan that I have in my head, then at 39, I\u2019ll be like, I can\u2019t do it any more than that. <\/p>\n

\u201cSo I don\u2019t want to be sitting at home saying \u2018I coulda, woulda, shoulda\u2019. And if I am sitting at home and I\u2019m watching it on the telly, I want to be saying, \u2018I tried.\u2019 And I didn\u2019t fail. I just tried. There is no fail because you can\u2019t fail.\u201d<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"\u201cI\u2019ve had a year of living somewhat normal,\u201d says Kellie Harrington, stirring her coffee on the North Strand.…\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":222994,"comment_status":"","ping_status":"","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[41],"tags":[2560,39116,85474,10258,95224,101,56,54,55,54828],"class_list":{"0":"post-222993","1":"post","2":"type-post","3":"status-publish","4":"format-standard","5":"has-post-thumbnail","7":"category-boxing","8":"tag-boxing","9":"tag-kellie-harrington","10":"tag-los-angeles-2028","11":"tag-olympic-games","12":"tag-paris-2024","13":"tag-sports","14":"tag-uk","15":"tag-united-kingdom","16":"tag-unitedkingdom","17":"tag-world-boxing-championships"},"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/uk\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/222993","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/uk\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/uk\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/uk\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/uk\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=222993"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/uk\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/222993\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/uk\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/222994"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/uk\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=222993"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/uk\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=222993"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/uk\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=222993"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}