![\"A](\"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/uk\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/04\/SEI_292185585-003b.jpg\")
\n\t\tMolly had intrusive sexual and violent thoughts (Picture: William Lailey\/SWNS)<\/p>\n
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\n\t\tMolly had intrusive sexual and violent thoughts (Picture: William Lailey\/SWNS)<\/p>\n
\u2018You think you\u2019re a monster, that you don\u2019t deserve to exist.\u2019<\/p>\n
These are the words of 22-year-old Molly Lambert whose mental health<\/a> condition convinced her she was a paedophile.<\/p>\n She lives with Pure-O Compulsive Disorder, a sub-type of OCD<\/a> where compulsions are mainly mental, rather than physical, affecting roughly 10% of those with obsessive compulsive disorder.<\/p>\n As a teenager, Molly experienced intrusive sexual and violent thoughts that made her fear she was a danger to others.<\/p>\n After seeing a TikTok<\/a> video about P-OCD \u2013 the paedophilic theme within OCD involving unwanted sexual thoughts or images about children \u2013 Molly was diagnosed herself in August 2025.<\/p>\n She stresses P-OCD is not paedophilia and chose to share her story to help others suffering in silence. The condition has caused her to obsess over themes including harm, morality, sexuality<\/a>, and existence.<\/p>\n \u2018It\u2019s not being a paedophile \u2013 it\u2019s that these thoughts exist and your brain latches onto them,\u2019 she explains. \u2018OCD is all about uncertainty. It tells you \u201cwhat if?\u201d and you can\u2019t prove it wrong.\u2019<\/p>\n \t\t She describes how different themes felt like \u2018the same lie in a different disguise\u2019. For Molly, the thoughts themselves were distressing, but she says they never reflected her intentions or desires.<\/p>\n Unlike some forms of OCD that involve physical rituals, her compulsions were internal.<\/p>\n \u2018I would replay thoughts, overanalyse everything, check comments, and second guess myself constantly,\u2019 Molly, a digital PR worker and mental health<\/a> advocate from Deansgate, Manchester<\/a>, says. \u2018You feel like you can\u2019t relax.<\/p>\n \u2018Intrusive thoughts can appear suddenly and feel vivid, I could be thinking about breakfast and suddenly imagine being stabbed.\u2019<\/p>\n She explains the cycle \u2013 resisting compulsions causes anxiety<\/a> spikes, but giving-in strengthens the pattern. Even now, stress or fatigue can make the thoughts feel stronger.<\/p>\n For years, she felt trapped in what she calls \u2018dark spirals\u2019 of shame.<\/p>\n \u2018The shame is in how you see yourself,\u2019 Molly adds. \u2018Even years later, that feeling can linger.<\/p>\n \u2018When you\u2019re figuring out who you are, OCD attacks everything and makes you question your identity.\u2019<\/p>\n Her recovery has not been straightforward. She first had therapy in 2023, which helped temporarily, but by 2024 her panic attacks worsened, leading her to try hypnotherapy. She was formally diagnosed in 2025.<\/p>\n \u2018The aftermath of recovery is awful, the shame is still there, just quieter,\u2019 Molly says. \u2018You have to deal with ongoing feelings.\u2019<\/p>\n \t\t It was speaking openly that was the turning point for her. \u2018Externalising it helped the most. For years I avoided talking about it, but once I did, it felt like the air cleared,\u2019 she adds.<\/p>\n Since speaking out about her condition online, she\u2019s received more than 1,000 messages from people of all ages who\u2019ve never told anyone about their intrusive thoughts. Many described years of fear, shame, and isolation.<\/p>\n \u2018The response has been overwhelming,\u2019 Molly shares. \u2018People say they\u2019ve been crying, that they\u2019ve felt like this for years and never told anyone.<\/p>\n \u2018Parents have reached out saying they have obsessions about harming their children. Some people said they ended up in psychiatric wards or tried to take their own lives.\u2019<\/p>\n She believes the taboo nature of these thoughts makes them more dangerous.<\/p>\n \u2018People don\u2019t talk about it, and that makes it worse,\u2019 Molly adds. \u2018Some messages are from people in their 50s who have been silently suffering their whole lives. It shows how common and hidden it is.\u2019<\/p>\n \t\t\t\tThe ‘Pure O’ problem\t\t\t<\/p>\n Pure-O exists as a term but OCD UK doesn\u2019t consider it a separate form of obsessive compulsive disorder.<\/p>\n The organisation says Pure-O<\/a> nearly always comes with outward compulsions too, making the term \u2018imprecise\u2019.<\/p>\n These physical compulsions could be:<\/p>\n Checking (various types of checking, from checking on Google to checking for own body reactions\/sensations) An OCD UK<\/a> spokesperson says: \u2018Pure-O is like any other form of OCD, it will involve both obsessions and compulsions, and treatment approaches would be no different than those used for every other type of OCD.\u2019<\/p>\n Molly also believes the stigma may be even stronger for men.<\/p>\n \u2018If I was a man, I\u2019d be terrified to open up,\u2019 she explains. \u2018OCD doesn\u2019t pick gender<\/a>, but men may fear being judged or accused. That\u2019s why awareness matters \u2013 it\u2019s not about desire or intent.\u2019<\/p>\n Despite her intentions, going public has led to a torrent of abuse.<\/p>\n \u2018I\u2019ve been called a \u201cnonce\u201d and told to die,\u2019 she says. \u2018I had to delete Facebook<\/a>, and my mum helps manage messages.<\/p>\n \u2018If people understood traditional OCD, they\u2019d see the same patterns in other forms. Reactions can push sufferers further into themselves, and that\u2019s why it\u2019s dangerous.\u2019<\/p>\n She tries her best to give out advice to those who confide in her, telling them to \u2018observe [the thoughts] and recognise the pattern\u2019.<\/p>\n \u2018You have to label it so it loses power,\u2019 Molly says. \u2018People want it to stop immediately, but understanding it is the only way.<\/p>\n \t\t \u2018It gives people permission to step back and realise it\u2019s their brain \u2013 not them being a monster.\u2019<\/p>\n Despite ongoing struggles, she remains determined to help others.<\/p>\n People have sought help, got diagnosed, or realised they\u2019re not alone after hearing my story. That\u2019s what matters,\u2019 she explains.<\/p>\n \u2018I wish I had earlier awareness, it could have saved me years of suffering. People message me saying they thought they were the only ones. <\/p>\n \u2018It\u2019s heart breaking, but it shows how vital it is to talk about it and to break that silence.\u2019<\/p>\n Do you have a story to share?<\/p>\n Get in touch by emailing MetroLifestyleTeam@Metro.co.uk<\/a>.<\/p>\n Arrow Arrow Arrow![\"Molly](\"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/uk\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/04\/SEI_292185593-c5e5-e1775475297370.jpg\")
\n\t\tMolly was diagnosed with this specific type of OCD in 2025 (Picture: Molly Lambert \/ SWNS)<\/p>\n![\"Molly](\"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/uk\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/04\/SEI_292185582-9fd4-e1775475340492.jpg\")
\n\t\tMolly is speaking out to let other people know they aren\u2019t alone (Picture: Molly Lambert \/ SWNS)<\/p>\n
\nSeeking reassurance from loved ones or avoidance of particular objects, places or people that trigger obsessional thoughts
\nWatching movies of an adult nature to check if there is arousal<\/p>\n![\"Molly](\"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/uk\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/04\/SEI_292185626-768f-e1775475398442.jpg\")
\n\t\tMolly gets a lot of abuse online from sharing her experience
(Picture: Molly Lambert \/ SWNS)<\/p>\n
\nMORE: He was the perfect man \u2013 then I smelled his Guinness farts<\/a><\/p>\n
\nMORE: \u2018Sectioned and given electric shock therapy \u2013 but I had a deadly brain bug, not depression\u2019<\/a><\/p>\n
\nMORE: My autistic daughter is living in hell \u2013 no one is helping<\/a><\/p>\n