{"id":562373,"date":"2026-05-02T12:23:07","date_gmt":"2026-05-02T12:23:07","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/uk\/562373\/"},"modified":"2026-05-02T12:23:07","modified_gmt":"2026-05-02T12:23:07","slug":"the-uk-and-us-are-boorish-in-their-own-ways-but-i-often-wish-i-were-british-dave-schilling","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/uk\/562373\/","title":{"rendered":"The UK and US are boorish in their own ways. But I often wish I were British | Dave Schilling"},"content":{"rendered":"

The so-called \u201cspecial relationship\u201d between Britain and the United States has never seemed more tenuous. At times, it looks like the US-UK alliance is a geopolitical version of a slowly disintegrating celebrity relationship where neither side wants to admit it\u2019s actually over, so someone has to do a crazy thing like cheating in the most high-profile manner possible to wrap things up. Like Klay Thompson (allegedly) stepping out on Megan Thee Stallion<\/a>, America has been making goo-goo eyes at Israel<\/a> for the last year, and King Charles is starting to get jealous.<\/p>\n

So the king popped into the White House for a tour of all the changes Donald and Melania have foisted upon the grounds. Have you seen the gaping hole where the East Wing used to be? And what a hole it is. To your left, you\u2019ll see the beehive.<\/p>\n

Yes, the White House now has a beehive<\/a> shaped like a mini-White House. What\u2019s better than a center for ants<\/a>? How about a presidential palace for bees? Donald Trump\u2019s penchant for building truly knows no bounds. In the US president\u2019s remarks at the start of the official visit, he said of our familial relations<\/a> with the UK: \u201cLong before Americans had a nation or a constitution, we first had a culture, a character and a creed.\u201d Yeah, maybe 300 years ago. What exactly do we have in common now besides the bones of a language (please don\u2019t ask an American what a \u201cloo\u201d is)?<\/p>\n

I have my own \u201cspecial relationship\u201d with the UK. I try to visit at least once a year, for work or pleasure. It\u2019s a lovely country with a historic culture, stunning architecture, and a prodigious artistic heritage. It also has something called \u201cDaddies Favorite Brown Sauce<\/a>\u201d, of which I have an unopened bottle in my pantry. Referred to lovingly as \u201cFull of Flavour\u201d, the concoction is certainly brown. Other than that, I can\u2019t speak much to what it actually is. Even after reading the ingredients on the back, I\u2019m flummoxed. There\u2019s vinegar, molasses, sugar dates, and \u201cspices\u201d. If it\u2019s not the spice melange from Dune<\/a>, then tell me what\u2019s in there. Mystery spice doesn\u2019t make me want to squirt this on my potatoes very much. I can\u2019t imagine America ever devising a food item defined primarily by its color. Would you dare pour something called \u201cpurple sauce\u201d on your steak? Probably not.<\/p>\n

Conversely, would the United Kingdom come up with something as diabolical as a Doritos Locos Taco? Would they fashion a sandwich out of two hunks of fried chicken<\/a> for bread? Send an English person to an Applebee\u2019s and they might think they\u2019ve been hurled into a perverse Roman food orgy-slash-carnival side-show.<\/p>\n

British culture can seem boorish \u2013 the tabloids, soccer fandom, Hollyoaks<\/a> \u2013 but it pales in comparison to the American variety. Our politicians look more and more like reality show ghouls<\/a>, and our reality show ghouls are becoming politicians<\/a>. We\u2019re hosting UFC fights<\/a> at the White House. If Keir Starmer decided to have an MMA fight in front of No 10, he\u2019d get shot out of a submarine\u2019s torpedo tube.<\/p>\n

That\u2019s really where our two countries go their separate ways. In the UK, as far as I can tell, decorum still reigns supreme, even if that\u2019s a bit of a put-on. Tact and politeness might not be universally applied by everyone in Britain, but the idea still carries some weight. It\u2019s a part of the national character. The punk sneering of the Sex Pistols could only germinate in a society that frowns upon anything brash or untoward. It\u2019s not surprising to me that the UK has been more aggressive about chastising its politicians over ties to Jeffrey Epstein<\/a> than we have. Outrage still seems like a potent concept in the UK, at least from this side of the Atlantic. The American psyche, on the other hand, thrives on creating characters to venerate who get off on smashing things.<\/p>\n

Britain\u2019s rigid class structure, which can make its citizens feel trapped by the accident of birth, is made possible by the stolid, stoic attitude of its citizens. And part of why America can feel like a buffet of riches for the taking is down to our piratic nature. The UK\u2019s head of state gets a little crown because of who his or her parents are. Our head of state is where he is because he coveted that role so much that he would move mountains to get it.<\/p>\n

Maybe I sound like a \u201cgrass is always greener\u201d buffoon for preferring the British version of life \u2013 the soggy drudgery of a life defined for you. How would I feel if I was freed from the unceasing ambition and lust for fame that is the American birthright? What if my parents hadn\u2019t fed me Taco Bell for every meal? To be shuttled from one meaningless mile marker of life to another, eating Tesco pre-packaged sandwiches and drinking beer at noon, sounds better somehow. I fear this might be a personal flaw unique to me and only me. Every British person I know is A) thrilled to have moved to Los Angeles and B) routinely embarrassed by the state of their sclerotic political system. Don\u2019t ask me why I don\u2019t believe them. I just think maybe they\u2019re missing something about their home country and how glorious it is to live in a place where sunshine is a novelty and you can watch all 13 seasons of For the Love of Dogs<\/a> on ITV.<\/p>\n

But as wide as the chasm of our two cultures can be, America can\u2019t help but take a few cues from our lordly ancestor. While the United States shied away from putting the face of the head of state on official documents and currency, that practice has been de rigueur in the UK for quite awhile. The king\u2019s crest is displayed on the cover of a British passport, placing the royal family and all it represents at the forefront of the country\u2019s identity. And if King Charles wanted to pop down to Boots for a Ribena, he could pay for the drink with banknotes featuring his face slathered all over them. I\u2019d be embarrassed at such a display of ego, and I\u2019m not even British.<\/p>\n

Now, America is slowly but surely following suit. Trump has already pushed for his face on coins<\/a>. Next up is passports, as the state department announced commemorative, limited edition releases to celebrate the 250th anniversary of the country<\/a>. Trump\u2019s face ominously obscures the Declaration of Independence, as though one person matters more than the values of the document that serves as the basis of our entire society. As much as I love Britain, this might be a practice I\u2019d prefer to not replicate.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"The so-called \u201cspecial relationship\u201d between Britain and the United States has never seemed more tenuous. At times, it…\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":562374,"comment_status":"","ping_status":"","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[3],"tags":[59,57,58,50,56,54,55],"class_list":["post-562373","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","category-united-kingdom","tag-gb","tag-great-britain","tag-greatbritain","tag-news","tag-uk","tag-united-kingdom","tag-unitedkingdom"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/uk\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/562373","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/uk\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/uk\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/uk\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/uk\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=562373"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/uk\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/562373\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/uk\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/562374"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/uk\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=562373"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/uk\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=562373"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/uk\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=562373"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}