There’s an old joke: \u201cWhat\u2019s a surefire way to win money in Las Vegas? Invest in the casinos.\u201d<\/p>\n
I\u2019ve never heard of a couple exchanging vows before their family, friends, and loved ones say, \u201cThis is probably not going to end well.\u201d On that sacred day at the courthouse, every couple believes their love is the exception\u2014 different, unique\u2014the one that is immune to statistics and the eventual argument about who gets to keep the $3,295 espresso machine. I have spent enough years as a therapist listening to spurned and jilted husbands and wives to know that, in the words of Yuval Harari, \u201cIt\u2019s all story.\u201d There\u2019s no objective truth, there\u2019s no there there, it\u2019s just \u201cHe said\u2026 she said\u2026\u201d (or \u201cHe said\u2026 he said\u2026\u201d or \u201cShe said\u2026 she said\u2026\u201d or \u201cThey said\u2026\u201d\u2014you get the point).<\/p>\n
Why a Prenup Makes Sense for Every Couple<\/p>\n
A prenuptial agreement isn’t a sign of doubt or pessimism<\/a> or weakness; it’s the only mature adult decision for people who aren\u2019t psychic with 100 percent batting average. I\u2019ve literally heard of husbands and wives just getting up one morning and leaving unexpectedly, out of nowhere, for no apparent reason.<\/p>\n So here are 10 reasons every couple, irrespective of income sizes, ego sizes, relationship histories, or certainty of undying love, should have a prenuptial agreement:<\/p>\n Marriage<\/a> is a legal agreement. Underneath the vows, the flowers, and the first dance is a binding contract that reallocates property, debt, and support obligations, whether or not you ever read the fine print. Pretending otherwise doesn’t make it less true; it just means someone else\u2014usually several attorneys and a judge\u2014will decide the terms for you later.
\nA significant percentage of marriages end in divorce<\/a>. I don\u2019t think the old \u201c50 percent\u201d myth from the swinging 1980s is still floating around dinner parties, but the CDC currently estimates the figure is closer to 41 percent for first marriages, with worse odds for second and third attempts at this lifelong commitment.
\nOnce a marriage deteriorates, people try to price the betrayal they feel in dollars (and child custody time). Litigation becomes the lingua franca of resentment. Signed while everyone still likes each other, a prenup takes much of that emotional terrorism off the table.
\nIt\u2019s probably the only honest conversation about money you’ll have before a decade of shared history raises the emotional stakes of every disagreement to code red. A prenup forces two people to negotiate fairness plainly, which will tell you more about the relationship than most idealistic wedding vows do.
\nIt protects whatever either of you builds during the marriage. Without an agreement, your business, your medical practice, your artwork and music\u2014all of it\u2014can become bargaining chips in a divorce, irrespective of who actually built whatever was built.
\nPrenups shield inheritances and family assets. Money that your parents designated for you shouldn’t end up as a document on a courtroom table; a prenup can keep your grandparents out of the proceedings.
\nPrenups replace possible years of exorbitant legal fees with a few afternoons or weeks of paperwork. Attorney fees for contested divorces routinely run into six figures\u2014and when forensic accountants and legal teams get involved, I\u2019ve seen attorney fees go into seven figures. This is money that could have gone toward vacations, education<\/a>, investments, and retirement<\/a>.
\nPrenups protect the lower-earning spouse, too. A well-drafted prenup isn’t a one-way shield for the wealthier partner; it can set minimum provisions and support terms that guarantee the less-monied spouse isn’t left with nothing after years of shared life.
\nIn California, marriages past 10 years leave courts with indefinite jurisdiction over spousal support. It\u2019s not a lifetime sentence, but it can be an open door, nonetheless. A prenup defines the terms in advance, instead of leaving them up to a judge years later.
\nTravis and Taylor have one! If a woman with a $2 billion empire decided the smartest pre-wedding move was a prenup drafted by her father, and that Travis agreed to it, that should tell you something about where actual financial and emotional intelligence<\/a> lands on this issue, irrespective of what your uncle or religious fanatics tell you.<\/p>\n