What are your bunker plans?
James, Portugal
Masses of things to read, incredible food and an unethical doctor with an\u00a0insane war chest of interesting pills. The second that bunker door closes, the doors of perception are\u00a0opening.<\/p>\n
Will Restore gain more traction by\u00a0the\u00a0next election and genuinely split the rightwing vote?
Natasha, London
They won\u2019t split it in some 50\u201150\u00a0way, but they could peel off a bit more from Reform\u2019s right flank. Nigel\u00a0Farage is looking vulnerable. In the Woody\u00a0Allen film Deconstructing Harry, Robin\u00a0Williams plays an actor who literally goes out of focus. Having once been sharp and clear, his nervous system is so shot that he becomes a physically blurred and imprecise distortion of himself. Metaphorically, something similar has happened to Farage in recent months.<\/p>\n
Who do you think is this generation\u2019s young Hugh\u00a0Grant (ie witty, funny, sexy, intelligent and gorgeous)?
Anna, New Zealand
It\u2019s being done as a job share between Jude\u00a0Bellingham and Cole Palmer.<\/p>\n
Are the men of the manosphere right\u00a0about anything?
Kate, London
I saw Clavicular say, \u201cMy life is a horror story\u201d, which feels about right.<\/p>\n
I have noticed a more serious tone in your columns this year. In light of recent events, here and abroad, are you finding it increasingly difficult to maintain your humorous disposition?
Tim, London
No. I\u2019m sorry, I must have been tired when I wrote those ones. It\u2019s always more effort to be funny than serious.<\/p>\n
If you met Andrew Tate, Elon Musk and Donald\u00a0Trump at a hideous dinner party, how would you greet and say goodbye to each of them?
Becky, Bristol
\u201cYou must try the beef bourguignon. I hear our hostess foraged the mushrooms herself.\u201d<\/p>\n
What would you have said to Margaret Thatcher\u2019s face if you\u2019d had a whole two minutes alone with her?
Eamon, Ireland
So much is known and has been written about her that new lines of inquiry can feel hard to come by. But I would have liked to find a way of getting her to reveal how she felt about being the object of so many men\u2019s crushes. Both those who worked around her and what Norma Desmond called \u201call those wonderful people out there in the dark\u201d. She knew, of\u00a0course, and would most certainly have had Inner Thoughts about the phenomenon. However, I have to say, it would be quite difficult to build the\u00a0rapport required to get them out\u00a0of\u00a0her in two minutes<\/p>\n
Why are journalists failing to make the case to the public that rightwingers such as Nigel\u00a0Farage, Richard Tice and Stephen Yaxley\u2011Lennon are dishonest, self\u2011serving and not terribly bright?
Alexis, Kent
I really don\u2019t think the vast majority of people pay the slightest direct attention to journalists at all. There are still some heavily invested continuity Corbynites out there who will imply that two or three critical columns I\u00a0wrote about their absolute boy had something to do with him losing his second general election on the bounce in 2019. To which my reply would be: \u201cYes, dear, I\u2019m sure they talked of little else but my columns on the doorsteps of the \u2018red wall\u2019. Yet, if we were to humour your notion that the whimsical musings of some silly cow in London make one nanoparticle of difference, how come I\u00a0wrote 937 critical articles about Boris Johnson and he still won a landslide?\u201d On the rightwingers front, however, I\u00a0would point out that it is journalists and not anyone else who have been exposing, for example, Farage, Tice and Yaxley\u2011Lennon\u2019s financial arrangements, and I\u2019m very grateful to\u00a0them for their work.<\/p>\n
The citations in your columns have taken me down some scurrilous rabbit holes I would not otherwise have encountered. How much of your\u00a0research is spent in corners of\u00a0the web you would rather not be? And do you have a therapist?!
Ian, Aylesbury, Buckinghamshire
Hahahahaha. Someone once told me they found out about edging videos from something I wrote about Theresa May\u2019s endlessly inconclusive Brexit votes in the Commons. I can only apologise. Personally, I love the fact that I can spend my days wading through the more recherche bits of contemporary culture, and if anyone sees me, just say, \u201cIt\u2019s for my WORK????\u201d As far as the last part of the question goes, I don\u2019t have a\u00a0therapist. It\u2019s so unfashionable, of course, but I have to say I\u2019m a big, big believer in pushing it all down. I know, I know \u2013 I consistently note people\u2019s looks of distaste when I tell them that. But I\u2019m just putting the counterpoint out there.<\/p>\n
Your articles usually speak to power. Have you ever felt fear of the potential consequences?
Chris, near Brighton, East Sussex
The most credible politically motivated threats I\u00a0have faced have been from the far right and the far\u00a0left \u2013 and always from supporters rather than any publicly known figures. But \u2013 so far! \u2013 I\u2019ve always found the bigger danger to be lone men who develop obsessions of one kind or another.<\/p>\n
Do you work on resilience?
Mary, Dublin
Not particularly consciously. But I\u00a0valorise it. The older I get, the more I\u00a0see that it is an endlessly useful kind of freedom. But that\u2019s easy for me to say, because I\u2019m so lucky. The\u00a0resilience it takes to be, say, a\u00a0woman in Afghanistan or a little girl in Congo is quite simply utterly inconceivable to me. I basically think that everything I have, and everything that I have achieved, is\u00a0overwhelmingly the result of luck and good fortune, and not remotely to do with any kind of exceptionalist skill.<\/p>\n
If you had to spend a month on a desert island with a group of footballers, politicians or celebs, which would you choose and why?
Charlie, Switzerland
Hot footballers, let\u2019s face it.<\/p>\n
Will Andy Burnham\u2019s plan for a\u00a0No\u00a010\u00a0North in Manchester be a\u00a0stroke of genius or his undoing?
Patrick, LaSalle, Canada
Neither (the most versatile answer\u00a0in\u00a0politics).<\/p>\n
Clearly, politicians are worse than\u00a0useless. Who would you pick as prime minister?
Eric, Newton Abbot, Devon
JK Rowling.<\/p>\n
\u2018He\u2019s funnier than me\u2019: Hyde co-hosts The Rest Is Entertainment podcast with Richard Osman. Photograph: Goalhanger Podcasts<\/p>\n
What\u2019s always off-limits to critique? And what would feel important enough to make you reconsider your\u00a0own boundaries?
Josh, Palm Springs, US
In general, I think everything can\u00a0and\u00a0should be written about, as\u00a0long as you get the right tone. Anything involving children is always what I\u2019d\u00a0be most cautious about.<\/p>\n
Do you have a writing routine?
Michael, Gij\u00f3n, Spain
I try to be at my desk at 5am, because I\u2019m definitely a\u00a0lark. Something that takes me five minutes at 5am will take me an\u00a0hour at 5pm. So the morning is definitely my best writing time. As far as column-writing goes, I\u00a0tend never to start with the first sentence. I just put a\u00a0few things down in a Word document and move them all round till some kind of column starts to stagger out of the primordial soup. I mostly don\u2019t know what I\u00a0think until I\u2019ve\u00a0gone through the act of writing about it, so the conclusion can often be as much of a\u00a0surprise to me as to anyone kind enough to read it.<\/p>\n
Which ludicrous situation involving a UK PM has made\u00a0you\u00a0laugh the most during\u00a0your career? The 1970s was a time of revolution, with so many groups up in arms. I\u00a0sensed the same energy at June\u2019s Dublin Dyke March: outrage, we\u2019ve\u00a0had enough \u2026 Do you think young people today have revolutionary energy? What is your favourite meal? Celebrity culture and AI promise a\u00a0world where some people are valued and others deemed worthless. What human qualities do you most value? Across your articles and podcasts, I\u00a0note you consume a huge amount of news and media. How on earth do you find the time? And do you have to take comprehensive notes in case you need to make connections between people or events at a later date? Set design: Victoria Twyman. Fashion styling: Hope Lawrie. Hair and makeup: Celine Nonon at Arlington Artists. Suit: Emilia Wickstead. Jewellery: Marina\u2019s own Photograph: Jay Brooks\/The Guardian<\/p>\n I\u2019m intrigued by your somewhat startling animus towards Andy Burnham<\/a>. What is driving this? How posh are you? What\u2019s the worst thing about working with Richard Osman on The Rest Is Entertainment? Are you still on X? If\u00a0so,\u00a0why? What\u2019s your favourite Brooklyn Beckham career? You often draw equivalence between\u00a0Labour and the Tories: \u201cThey\u2019re all as bad as each other.\u201d Do you ever worry that you\u2019re contributing to an anti\u2011political climate that is one of the factors rendering Britain ungovernable? Will art save us? What usually drags you out of\u00a0bed\u00a0in\u00a0the morning? Does anyone care if Prince Harry is\u00a0in\u00a0or out? Are the people ahead of\u00a0the papers on this one? What makes you feel hopeful and\u00a0optimistic? What\u2019s your favourite word in\u00a0the\u00a0English language?
Richard, NSW, Australia
Tony Blair having someone at the Foreign Office during the Iraq war whose official, ask-at-reception job title was \u201chead of story development\u201d. That was quite a mirthless laugh, obviously. David\u00a0Cameron? Either leaving his daughter in the pub<\/a> during a \u201ctroubled families\u201d initiative week, or the shagging-the-pig\u2019s-head<\/a> thing. Theresa May calling a general election and the exit poll coming out at 10pm showing she\u2019d lost her majority. Boris\u00a0Johnson hiding from the media in a big fridge<\/a>. Liz Truss spending her entire career wanging on about the infallibility of free markets, then getting her arse handed to her by them in about 10 minutes. Rishi\u00a0Sunak calling the election in the driving rain<\/a>, and then not realising that binning off Normandy D-day<\/a> celebrations for a media interview would play badly. Keir Starmer calling for the return of\u00a0the Gaza sausages<\/a>. Andy Burnham: TBC, but it\u2019s coming, I\u00a0assure you.<\/p>\n
Ger, Dublin
Not at all, I have to say. I think as long as people have smartphones in their hands, they will be too narcotised to rebel. There\u2019s a kind of dropout energy in a lot of young people, which is as completely understandable as it is completely sad. I really feel for them.<\/p>\n
Douglas, Germany
Honestly, my next one. At home, I\u00a0make a huge amount of schnitzel in\u00a0all kinds of ways. And multiple types of apple pie. Very pleased (and culinarily jealous) to be giving this answer to someone based in\u00a0Germany.<\/p>\n
Sean, Swinford, County Mayo
Compassion, tolerance, wisdom, kindness, bravery, strength of character. And GSOH.<\/p>\n
Simon, Windsor, Berkshire
I love the idea of notes, but, no \u2013 I\u00a0have never taken any! Maybe I\u00a0need to get Stacey Solomon to do an episode of Sort Your Life Out in my memory palace. The truth is my\u00a0brain just works quite associatively, so\u00a0something in politics will always remind me of something in sport or music, and it often ends up feeling more illuminating to me that way.<\/p>\n
Ricardo, Carshalton, south\u00a0London
Listen, I\u2019ve been hurt before. Meet you back here in two years?<\/p>\n
Rob, New Zealand
I guess I can hold my own.<\/p>\n
Katie, Dublin
He\u2019s funnier than me. Also, he only pretends to support Fulham. That second one might not be true \u2013 I just wanted to say something in a public forum that would incense him but where he wouldn\u2019t be present to reply. (Try writing to the letters page, Richard \u2013 see how you get on.)<\/p>\n
Caroline, Switzerland
Yes, I am. I don\u2019t use it much at\u00a0all\u00a0as I find social media a massive time\u2011suck. I hear Bluesky\u00a0is truly ghastly, but have\u00a0never visited.<\/p>\n
Martin, Weston-super-Mare, Somerset
2042 chairman of the Federal\u00a0Reserve.<\/p>\n
Shaun, Punta del Este, Uruguay
I hope I\u2019ve never used that phrase, Shaun. However, when any side falls short of the standards we should expect in public life, it massively undermines trust in all politicians. That\u2019s happened a lot since the turn of the millennium. But I don\u2019t think Britain is ungovernable, and I\u00a0fundamentally believe that politics is still the best way we have of making\u00a0people\u2019s lives better.<\/p>\n
Steven, London
Unclear. Still, what a way to go.<\/p>\n
Peter, Perth
Insomnia\u2019s pretty helpful. But\u00a0I\u2019ve\u00a0usually got lots to do\u00a0and\u00a0I\u00a0love a new day.<\/p>\n
Paul, London
I definitely think stories about him and Meghan<\/a> do a lot of traffic, which is\u00a0why he gets written about so much. I think a lot of people claim they\u2019re not at all interested and yet still read huge amounts about him. I\u2019m\u00a0like this about The Rock\u2019s multiple\u00a0business ventures. Could not care less\u00a0about them; have read 23\u00a0articles this week about them.<\/p>\n
Pauline, Bristol
Love, human ingenuity and listening\u00a0to pop music.<\/p>\n
Rick, Manchester
Cocktailhour.<\/p>\n