![\"\u05dc\u05d9\u05d6\u05d4](\"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/uk\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/11\/S1CXHp2hMx_0_0_3000_2000_0_x-large.jpg\" "\\"Liza")
<\/a><\/p>\nLiza Amichay: “For an entire year, I wasn’t emotionally available to my children”<\/p>\n
(Photo: Dana Kopel)<\/p>\n
Nine years ago, after Yishai was born by planned cesarean section, everything changed. “Even in the hospital, I didn’t want to be alone with Yishai. I was actually quite afraid of him. I tried to behave as though everything was normal. <\/p>\n
“One day, I went to a caf\u00e9 with him and a friend. When he cried and spat up, I handed him to her along with some napkins and continued looking at the menu. She realized something was wrong and told me, ‘You need to see a psychiatrist immediately.’ I called my health care provider right then and was told the earliest available appointment was in three months. I started crying. <\/p>\n
“A few minutes later, the receptionist called back and told me an appointment had opened up for the following day. I went to the psychiatrist without even telling my husband. I spoke slowly and quietly, with my eyes lowered. I told him I wasn’t myself, that I didn’t feel like doing anything, that I had no energy, that I wanted peace and quiet, that I felt alone, sad, empty and guilty. When I looked up, he told me, ‘You’re suffering from postpartum depression.'”<\/p>\n
That marked the beginning of a long course of treatment. “The first medication didn’t work. My condition deteriorated rapidly. I would take little Yishai into my bed and stay there with him until my husband came home from work and took him from me. My friends came in shifts to look after the children. <\/p>\n
“I was in such a helpless state that I couldn’t even open the door for them. They would get the key from the neighbors and let themselves in. I could hear them playing with the children while I lay in bed. I don’t know how I survived it. I told myself that for all those years I’d been wearing a mask, the real Liza had now been exposed. I wanted to get into my car and crash into a wall.”<\/p>\n
“The psychiatrist said I needed round-the-clock supervision, but I refused to be hospitalized. My parents took care of us both. When I realized I had suicidal thoughts and that I might also harm Yishai, I agreed to be admitted to a psychiatric hospital. I spent two weeks as an inpatient, followed by two months in a day-treatment program.<\/p>\n
“To secure a place for Yishai in daycare, I had to turn to social services and seek assistance under Israel’s law for toddlers at risk. That was one of the hardest things I’ve ever had to do. After all, I was an educational counselor who contacted social services on behalf of others. Suddenly, I was the one who needed their help. Looking back, I realize that recognizing what you’re going through and asking for help is an enormous strength.”<\/p>\n
After her hospitalization, she was no longer suicidal, but her recovery was far from complete. About seven months after the birth, her husband urged her to talk to their older children, who were struggling. <\/p>\n
“At first, I didn’t understand what he wanted from me. I was so focused on surviving that I hadn’t realized the whole family was going through this with me. I sat down with Yinon, who was 9 at the time, and asked how he was doing. He told me, ‘I’m OK, but it’s a little hard because when Papa isn’t home, I have to be Papa.’ <\/p>\n
“His words pierced my heart. Then he asked, ‘What’s wrong with you? You don’t have cancer, but you’re very sick. So what illness do you have?'”<\/p>\n
Were you able to answer him?
\n“Yes. I told him that the body and mind are connected, and that when my mind is so sick, I feel it in my body too. He suggested I exercise to feel better. Suddenly, I saw how much my child had grown up because of what we were going through.”<\/p>\n
Her conversation with Hillel, then 7, was equally painful. “When I asked him how he was doing, he broke down crying. ‘I’m crying because I want my mom back. Since Yishai was born, you’re not my mom anymore.'”<\/p>\n
Determined to reconnect with her children, Amichay began spending more time in the living room, even when she wasn’t feeling well, simply so they could see her and know she was present.<\/p>\n
About 10 months after the birth, she finally received medication that helped. But as her own condition improved, the emotional impact on her children became increasingly apparent. “Yinon started having angry outbursts, and I didn’t know how to respond, either as a mother or as an educational counselor. Yinon and Hillel were diagnosed with attention-deficit\/hyperactivity disorder (ADHD). <\/p>\n
“Seeking to understand their behavior and needs, I began studying coaching for children with ADHD and later trained in parent counseling, specializing in ADHD and divorce-related family challenges. The studies included training at Schneider Children’s Medical Center and an Adlerian parenting education program. <\/p>\n
“Once I understood their world, I was able to be more understanding and supportive. Later, I wanted to combine my professional knowledge with my personal experience to help other parents.”<\/p>\n
About three years ago, she left the Education Ministry and opened a private practice where she works with parents, children and adolescents. She also gives lectures about her personal experience. <\/p>\n
“When a mother tells me she stays in her car for another half hour because she doesn’t have the strength to go upstairs and face her children, I’m not shocked and I don’t judge her. I used to be that mother too. I tell my patients what I’ve been through, and it gives them strength. <\/p>\n
“They feel alone and guilty. I want to help them understand their children and enjoy being with them. For an entire year, I wasn’t emotionally available to my children. I didn’t touch them enough, didn’t talk to them enough or take as much interest in them as I wanted to. That’s where my desire to learn more, understand more and be there for them came from.”<\/p>\n
One of her most important realizations came from her late sister-in-law Keren, her husband’s sister. “We were both sick at the same time. I had depression and she had cancer. One day, she told me she was lucky because people understood her illness and didn’t judge her. ‘You’re no less sick than I am, but people think you have a choice,’ she added. <\/p>\n
“That sentence changed the way I looked at depression because I realized I couldn’t blame myself for something I hadn’t chosen. I used to think recovery meant going back to who I was. Today, I understand that I don’t want to go back to exactly the person I used to be. <\/p>\n
“Feeling that I had to handle everything, keep it all together and prove I could manage on my own wasn’t healthy. Today, I have a different standard for myself. I don’t need to prove anything to anyone. I just need to know that I’m doing the best I can at any given moment.”<\/p>\n
What would you say today to a woman who suspects she may have postpartum depression?
\n“Don’t face it alone. The loneliness can be overwhelming. I know the thoughts that come with it: Why is everyone else doing fine while I’m struggling? Why do I feel this way? Am I ungrateful? Am I a terrible mother? Talk to a friend, your partner or your family doctor. You don’t have to go straight to a psychiatrist. People want to help, and as hard as it may be, you need to let them. You’re dealing with an illness you didn’t choose, and you have nothing to be ashamed of.”<\/p>\n
A few months ago, at the end of one of her lectures, a woman approached her in tears and told her she was the person who had arranged her psychiatric appointment nine years earlier. “It turned out she had recognized my voice when I called. Our older sons had been in the same class. <\/p>\n
“She told me she had pleaded with the staff to find me an appointment. That’s when I realized how one person choosing not to look the other way can change someone’s life. If I’d had to wait three months for that appointment, I don’t know if I’d still be alive today.”<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"“For years, I was considered a woman everyone could rely on, someone who would function exactly as expected…\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":834120,"comment_status":"","ping_status":"","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[44],"tags":[102,1906,6623,56,54,55],"class_list":["post-834119","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","category-mental-health","tag-health","tag-mental-health","tag-mentalhealth","tag-uk","tag-united-kingdom","tag-unitedkingdom"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/uk\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/834119","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/uk\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/uk\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/uk\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/uk\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=834119"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/uk\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/834119\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/uk\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/834120"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/uk\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=834119"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/uk\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=834119"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/uk\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=834119"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}