Dear Eric: I was recently in a pretty bad car accident. I was knocked unconscious among other things. My first memory is waking up in the hospital, not knowing what was going on, and having a nurse ask me if I wanted anything for the pain. I said no. Then the nurse stepped out in the hallway and yelled, \u201che\u2019s a tough guy; doesn\u2019t want any pain meds.\u201d This was brought up to me later in my two-week hospital stay, that I was trying to be a tough guy. I don\u2019t even know how to respond to that; nor do I think I\u2019ve ever had a high tolerance for pain.<\/p>\n
\u2013 No Pain<\/p>\n
Dear Pain: It\u2019s clear there was a miscommunication there. It behooved the nurse to treat you with respect and care. And let\u2019s say that your response was more brusque than you\u2019ve characterized it here \u2013 you also had a head injury so you may not have been fully yourself. Empathy and clear communication go a long way, especially in the realm of pain management.<\/p>\n
Many people find that their pain is underreported or downplayed in some medical situations. Studies have shown that elderly people, women, and non-white people experience undertreatment of pain at a disproportionate rate. So, it can be helpful to have a loved one or friend with you to help advocate and communicate on your behalf.<\/p>\n
Empathy is also needed in the reverse. According to a survey conducted by National Nurses United,<\/a> the nation\u2019s largest union of registered nurses, a shocking 81.6 percent of nurses experienced workplace violence in 2023. <\/p>\n When we show up on our worst days at a hospital or urgent care, it\u2019s crucial to remember that nurses and other healthcare workers are the remedy, not the cause of our pain. And they work incredibly hard, often for far less money than they should. If a patient isn\u2019t feeling heard or respected, that\u2019s the time to bring in another person \u2013 another member of staff, a loved one.<\/p>\n Send questions to R. Eric Thomas at eric@askingeric.com<\/a> or P.O. Box 22474, Philadelphia, PA 19110. Follow him on Instagram<\/a> and sign up for his weekly newsletter at rericthomas.com<\/a>.<\/p>\n If you purchase a product or register for an account through a link on our site, we may receive compensation. By using this site, you consent to our User Agreement<\/a> and agree that your clicks, interactions, and personal information may be collected, recorded, and\/or stored by us and social media and other third-party partners in accordance with our Privacy Policy.<\/a><\/p>\n