Benny Blanco rocks the JCC
Superstar music producer, husband of Selena Gomez, and certified NJB (nice Jewish boy) Benny Blanco pulled up to the San Francisco Jewish Community Center on Tuesday night for an evening of introspection and jokes, in conversation with podcaster and author Debbie Millman. Blanco demanded that no media be allowed to cover the event, and audience members were warned not to take photos or record the conversation. The Waggle got in the old-fashioned way: We bought a ticket.
Blanco’s appearance was quite the get for the JCC, whose usual speaking guests lean more toward publishing and academic fame, not one of the top-selling songwriters of the century who shares a bed with a Disney star.
The JCC proved to be predictably unfamiliar with the hip-hop game, with one moderator referring to SZA, one of Blanco’s artist-collaborators, by spelling out her name in initials. (It’s pronounced “Sizza,” obv.) It also proved unfamiliar with the thermostat, as Blanco remarked twice that the auditorium was freezing while he tried to adjust his pants to cover his sockless ankles.
Blanco, 38, was here to promote his new book, “Fuck Failure,” which encourages people not to let fear of embarrassment stop them, and to embrace the interesting unpredictability of a free-flowing career. Blanco’s started at 13, when he cold-called record labels posing as a lawyer for Jay-Z. He went on to write or produce a murderer’s row of pop hits, including Katy Perry’s “Hot n Cold,” Kesha’s “TiK ToK,” Ed Sheeran’s “Castle on the Hill,” Justin Bieber’s “Love Yourself,” Rihanna’s “Diamonds,” and Taio Cruz’s “Dynamite.”
But the majority of the evening wasn’t spent on name-dropping, but on telling mom jokes. When the Virginia-born Blanco opted not to go to college, his mother wanted him to have a backup plan outside of the entertainment industry. She “didn’t know she could follow her dream,” too, he said. That dream was partially fulfilled at a Maroon 5 show, when his mom asked singer Adam Levine to turn down the bass. “And she was serious,” Blanco said. The other Jewish moms in the audience erupted in laughter.
In addition to his music career, Blanco said he has been focusing on his health and relationships, making up the “three-legged stool” that forms the foundation of his life. He told the JCC he deals with the same insecurities they do: that he has reached his peak, that maybe he isn’t that great after all. But his biggest fear?
“I hope they don’t put out all my bad music when I die.”
New hit podcast set looks manly, actually inspired by drag
Kevin Roose, left, and Casey Newton on the super manly set of their new NPR podcast.
Journalists and friends of The Waggle, Casey Newton and Kevin Roose, debuted their new NPR podcast, “Machine Gods,” this week and with it a new San Francisco-based podcast studio designed in a style we shall call “men discussing things.” Roose, formerly of The New York Times, and Newton, the founder of Platformer, are fresh off co-hosting “Hard Fork,” a nerdy Times tech podcast that was also sometimes funny. “Machine Gods” has the same geeky-cheeky vibes, but is no longer recorded in a studio Newton likened to a “Soviet broom closet.” The Waggle reached out to Newton to ask about the new digs.
What was the inspiration behind the set? It’s giving cigars and whiskey, a safe space for men.
The Machine Gods set is a space for all genders! In fact, we took a lot of inspiration from drag queens: So many YouTube series we love feature two queens chatting in big, comfy chairs open to the audience and with no desk in front of them.
Will your guests sit on the levitating gold table, sandwiched between you?
When we bring in guests, we swap out the big white chairs.
Are those lightsabers on the wall?
They’re not lightsabers. Our production designer, Skye Prey, took our basic sketch and filled it in with strange handcrafted robots from Etsy, candelabras that look like lightsabers, and other touches that hopefully encourage people to look deeper.
Do you always wear “fun socks” or does it depend on your mood?
For the last many years I have been a happy customer of Happy Socks, which feature whimsical designs that don’t really go with anything but always make me feel a little jaunty. Until the debut, I wasn’t aware they would play such a prominent role in the edit. This is one of the problems with having to pay close attention to what you look like, in a serious way, for the first time at the age of 46.
The logo: Is that more Mayan- or Aztec-inspired? Is it because you think tech companies are planning to sacrifice humans?
There’s this great line on the new Phoebe Bridgers record where she sings: “The government isn’t trying to kill you, they just don’t care if they kill you.” I think that applies to an unfortunate number of tech platforms. Anyway! We worked with this amazing visual designer named Alex Castro, and he had this idea of making art that was ambiguously ancient and futuristic at the same time. So we use these tile designs that take inspiration from these ancient civilizations, but also from circuit boards. Meet the new gods, same as the old gods!
Ick of the week: Alexandr Wang’s ‘money bukkake’ tweet
The Waggle has unironically applauded Meta AI chief Alexandr Wang’s thrift-forward fashion choices (opens in new tab) and wolf cut mullet hairstyle. But we can not in any way endorse his disgusting way of describing SF to his “non-tech friends.” (Seriously, as if he has any.) Alexandr, you’re an interesting dresser, but let’s keep your weirdest thoughts in the closet.
Are there really panties inside the Oracle mitt?
The mitt has a secret. | Source: Minh Connors for The Standard
There’s a longstanding rumor about the big 27-foot baseball mitt in Oracle Park, where the Giants used to win the World Series. Supposedly, there are a bunch of women’s panties sealed inside the glove. It sounds like some sophomoric prank or hazing ritual involving long-gone Giants rookies. But, after a Very Serious Waggle Investigation(™), we can confirm the rumors are true, and the facts aren’t what we expected.
At the turn of the millennium, an all-women team constructed the now iconic baseball mitt, (opens in new tab)outside in Oakland in the winter sun and rain. They put their blood, sweat, tears, and underwear into the work. Artist Leigh Barbier, who was part of the crew, confirmed the longstanding panty rumor. “Yes, it is true,” she wrote The Waggle. “We all put a pair of underwear inside the mitt. I can’t remember if we signed them or not.”
Leigh Barbier and friends on the mitt they built. They left behind some unmentionables.
Apparently, it goes back to tradition. As Audrey Newell, the project manager, explained, “it was our lady version” of the tradition of preparators, or museum installation constructors, leaving worn-out boots or tired work clothes beneath a construction as a memento. The artists’ panties were sealed within a fiberglass shell inside the mitt, so they can’t be removed. Some men who worked on installing the mitt at the ballpark signed their names next to the treasures. One, Newell remembers, told her he “sniffed ’em.” Lovely.
Before you ask, “Yes, my garish satin and lace purple panties were clean,” Newell confirmed. Although, she does recall a pair of “period workhorse undies” in the mix. If you want to see what Barbier’s been up to lately, her artwork is featured in a group exhibition at 111 Minna, “Passion Projects SF: The Artist Behind the Effect,” that opened on Thursday.
‘Punk is not dead. San Francisco is not dead’
The coolest new music venue in San Francisco doesn’t charge covers or card minors. It’s the sidewalk near the corner of 16th and Valencia streets, where an impromptu punk show brought in hundreds of cool, hip youths last Friday, right outside Muddy Waters Cafe. A small mosh pit even broke out, a frothing puddle of bobbing wolf cuts, mullets, and stick and poke tattoos.
Organized by punk bands Misandrist and AlgoSlave, the show was a redux of a similar event in April, when the members of Misandrist spontaneously decided to perform on the street near where their bassist lives. This time, the bands went bigger, hand-delivering letters to each person who lived 150 feet outside Muddy Waters as is required by the city for a Temporary Occupancy Permit. (A permitted punk show — imagine!)
“So many people ended up showing up, people were flowing into the street and sitting on top of their cars, which was cool. People across the street were dancing on the balcony, everyone seemed super stoked on it” says Erp, Misandrist’s lead singer. “It’s important to remember the SF scene is fun and alive.” (The Waggle was able to get in touch with Erp through our college friend’s high school friend’s ex-boyfriend.)
The show’s highlight was the Knights of Molino, the adolescent punk band who are way cooler than us at 12. Named after Molino Street in Mill Valley, these kids might actually be alright. “Please go vote because we can’t,” said one of the bandmembers. “So fucking cute,” Erp said.
They joined the lineup after Erp heard them playing at a pizza place. “Me and my friend followed the music to their show and freaked out when we saw they were actual children. I was so gagged when I went to message them on Instagram about the show and found out they were internet famous,” Erp said.
The band members, who are 12, 13, and 14 years old, respectively, went viral this time last year for their takedown of generative AI: “Take Back Control. (opens in new tab)” Their drummer and singer, a pocket-sized Eminem, closed the set with a cover of San Francisco punk legends the Dead Kennedys. “People were moshing in roller skates and crowdsurfing and slow dancing,” Erp recounted.
“Punk is not dead. San Francisco is not dead 🤘🤘” The Knights later posted on Instagram (opens in new tab), explaining the song choice. Their first album, appropriately named First Album, comes out 11/4. You can also catch Misandrist this Friday at Bottom of the Hill.
Meet the masked men behind those guerrilla AI ads
Speaking of misbehaving punk rockers: You may have noticed that the AI billboard on your friendly neighborhood Muni stop is saying the quiet part out loud lately. “Sick and tired of seeing AI ads everywhere you go in San Francisco? Too Bad. Go Fuck Yourself,” reads one. “We hope you die cold and alone after our AI employee replaces you, you piece of shit,” states another. Subtle!
A viral stunt executed by the band the Civic Joy Fucks, the anti-AI parody ads are so good, they are almost indistinguishable from the real thing. In a reel posted to the band’s Instagram, they demonstrate the elaborate process of pulling off the heist, going around to different Muni stops and replacing the ads inside.
The band, which wears masks of its ideological enemies Daniel Lurie, Manny Yekutiel, and Chris Larsen on stage and in their social media, takes cues from Jello Biafra of the Dead Kennedys (yep, them again), who once famously wore a Ronald Reagan mask on stage. They describe themselves as a “new technofacist cronycore punk trio straight from the shit-strewn sidewalks of Salesforce City.” (Whew, say that five times fast.) One of the members posts scathing impersonations of Lurie’s Instagram updates, emphasizing his tech-friendliness, and complete with a well done “Let’s Go, San Francisco.”
The Waggle reached out to the Joy Fucks for comment, but like the good punks they are, they ignored us. We’ll try again at their second show ever, a free performance at El Rio on Friday from 6 to 8 pm. Seriously, no fucks given.
Just like the ol’ days — a line for a new iPhone
Bill LeBlond, a retired former Chronicle Books cookbook editor, had to wake up early Friday morning to get to a dental appointment at the San Francisco Surgery Center. Emerging from the Powell Street Muni station and walking up to Union Square, LeBlond came across a blocks-long line stretching from the front door of the Apple Store on Post Street. What were so many people doing up so early, and why were some sitting in chairs, bent over laptops?
Turns out he’d stumbled on iPhone Duo release day. LeBlond, who lives in Duboce Triangle and is the stepfather of Patrick Heij, the satirist-in-chief behind The Standard’s sister site San Francisco Currently (opens in new tab), snapped pics of the hundreds of foldable iPhone fans, for whom the biggest problem with the standard iPhone is that it’s just not big enough.
The most curious sighting was of a woman holding a sign offering $5,000 cash for a Duo, specifying that the product had to be 512 GB or larger, star white, and “must be new/unopened/plastic factory sealed.” LeBlond surmised that the woman had been hired by someone who didn’t want to wait in the line. She didn’t seem like someone who’d want to blow $5,000 on a phone that you could purchase inside for $2100. “Her sign was amateurish,” he said.
Dental surgery aside, LeBlond wasn’t all that interested in joining the queue himself. The Wall Street Journal review (opens in new tab) he’d read “wasn’t great,” he said. “It was OK, not a pan, but not a slam dunk.” And definitely not worth paying someone else to spend $5,000 on.
A Lurie* house hits the market (*not that Lurie)
San Francisco just hit another eye-watering milestone in its manic housing market: A Presidio mansion just fetched eight figures — over its asking price. The eight-bedroom home at 20 Cherry St. (opens in new tab) sold for $28.5 million, after being listed for $18.5 million mere weeks before.
For decades, the home was owned by trusts belonging to former Giants owner Bob Lurie (no relation to Mayor Daniel Lurie), and the late (opens in new tab)Jane Lurie (opens in new tab), his ex-wife. The home occasionally hosted teenage rock band rehearsals, according to real estate agent David Cary, who recalls practicing there (opens in new tab).
It was built in 1966 by famed local architecture firm Whisler-Patri, known for designing city landmarks like Hotel Nikko and the original (opens in new tab)SF Centre mall (opens in new tab) (RIP) before its redesign in the 2000s.
“It backs onto the greenery of the Presidio and it’s a huge lot — like four lots combined,” said Nina Hatvany, a Compass agent who represented the home’s buyers. While she declined to dish on their identities, she described them as a “local family” who outbid three other offers. (If any Wagglers know names, send ’em our way!)
“They are willing to put the time and energy into renovating the house in the way that it deserves,” she said. “I think it’s going to be one of the very, very best homes in San Francisco once they’re done with it.”
Overheard outside the Kaiser on Geary
Man on phone: If you’re going to be obviously on coke at your party, share! That’s good manners.