Apparently unsatisfied with running the fourth-largest economy in the world \u2014 sorry, Japan \u2014 Gov. Gavin Newsom is very, very busy talking about himself.<\/p>\n
In the midst of a national book tour to promote his new political memoir, \u201cYoung Man in a Hurry,\u201d \u2014 the kind of book you write when you\u2019re totally not running for president \u2014 Newsom stopped by the studio of Adam Friedland, a 38-year-old socialist alternative comedian who loves interrupting guests of his internet talk show with left-field questions.<\/p>\n
During their hourlong conversation on \u201cThe Adam Friedland Show,\u201d the two touched on the Fox News-inflected view of California, the Willie Brown political machine, and \u2014 twice! \u2014the Folsom Street Fair.<\/p>\n
As a service to our readers who are either too classy to listen to Friedland \u2014 a guy who got famous as third mic on the seminal \u201cdirtbag left\u201d podcast \u201cCum Town\u201d \u2014 or simply find his whiny, interrupting style irritating, we did a rundown of Newsom\u2019s hourlong appearance for the best SF-related nuggets. First, a fact-check from the podcast: Any San Franciscan worth their salt knows that the purported Mark Twain quote \u201cThe coldest winter I ever spent was a summer in San Francisco\u201d is just an urban myth.\u00a0<\/p>\n
Newsom hasn\u2019t been to Burning Man, but Burners were \u201chis people back in the day\u201d<\/p>\n
Few public figures seem less suited to attend a desert bacchanal than Newsom, whose unbuttoned oxford shirts wouldn\u2019t breathe well on the Playa.\u00a0\u00a0<\/p>\n
Newsom took credit for publicly displaying Burning Man sculptures in California and agreed with the conventional wisdom that Nevada\u2019s annual confab of goggle-clad Software Americans just isn\u2019t that cool anymore<\/a>. \u201cNow it\u2019s all, Burning Man is gentrified,\u201d Newsom said, before asking Friedland, \u201cYou ever tried ketamine? Seems like there\u2019s a lot of people talking about ketamine.\u201d<\/p>\n The trendy, dissociative horse tranquilizer came up surprisingly often during the conversation \u2014 three times, by our count.\u00a0\u00a0<\/p>\n He says \u201cPresidio\u201d weirdly<\/p>\n When the governor came to The Standard\u2019s office in the lovely Costco Valley neighborhood, the hosts of \u201cPacific Standard Time\u201d subjected him to what\u2019s become the benchmark humiliation ritual of modern media: a \u201csilly\u201d question shot vertically for social.<\/p>\n We asked him his favorite place in San Francisco, and he said it was the Presidio. And really, who can take issue with one of the city\u2019s crown jewels?\u00a0<\/p>\n But instead of saying \u201cPress-IH-dee-oh,\u201d he hits the hard E, as in \u201cPress-seedy-oh.\u201d It\u2019s a pronunciation he repeated during his podcast appearance and one we can\u2019t seem to forgive, especially because the Presidio is easily the least seedy part of town \u2014 and one adjacent to the part of San Francisco that Newsom represented on the Board of Supervisors.<\/p>\n \u201cShe was 19, bro\u201d<\/p>\n By now, Newsom has appeared on enough podcasts that certain verbal tics are emerging from a career politician trying his best to sound authentic.\u00a0<\/p>\n Many of these \u2014 like an overuse of \u201cbro\u201d \u2014 are firmly in the \u201cguys being dudes (opens in new tab)<\/a>\u201d category.\u00a0<\/p>\n They\u2019re mostly harmless, but perhaps the strangest deployment was when he was discussing his parents\u2019 divorce and the age at which they got married.\u00a0<\/p>\n \u201cHe was 33, man. As he described it, \u2018scandal,\u2019\u201d Newsom said of his father, punctuating the last word with airquotes. \u201cShe was 19, bro. That\u2019s ridiculous. And imagine being like 19, and a couple years later with two kids, and you come from no money, man.\u201d<\/p>\n Newsom\u2019s SF lightning round<\/p>\n Best delicacy: Lucca Delicatessen<\/a> on Chestnut Street<\/p>\n Best athlete: Joe Montana \u2014\u00a0despite Friedland\u2019s best efforts to get him to name a certain San Francisco-born Heisman-award-winning football player who once owned a Ford Bronco.\u00a0<\/p>\n Best band: The Grateful Dead. Although in line with one of his political heroes, Newsom says he never inhaled (opens in new tab)<\/a>.\u00a0<\/p>\n \u201cYou stood there listening to deedle deedle deedle for four hours and not doing any weed?\u201d Friedland interrogated.\u00a0<\/p>\n Newsom insists, despite all available evidence, that he was a loser in high school<\/p>\n Here\u2019s his case:\u00a0<\/p>\n 1. He wore a suit to school every day, which he claims was inspired by Pierce Brosnan on the TV show \u201cRemington Steele.\u201d\u00a0<\/p>\n 2. He had a Flock of Seagulls haircut.\u00a0<\/p>\n 3. He had bad grades. (\u201cSuit and bad grades is psychotic,\u201d Friedland remarked.)<\/p>\n None of this moved his host, who produced a photo of Newsom as a hunky 6-foot-3 star baseball player. \u201cYou were batting .460!\u201d Friedland exclaimed. \u201cThis is a guy who lost his virginity at 11. \u2026 I need him.\u201d<\/p>\n Newsom copped to his impressive batting average but insisted he did not do the deed until senior year. It all seemed of a piece with his book\u2019s self-effacing tone, which Friedland speculated was a preemptive defense to criticisms that Newsom looks like his dad is \u201cCEO of the Money Company.\u201d<\/p>\n He is kind of a freak, though<\/p>\n Even as he angles for federal office, Newsom doubled down on his San Francisco bona fides.<\/p>\n \u201cA lot of people go to the Castro Street Fair. You\u2019ve gotta go to the Folsom Street Fair<\/a>,\u201d he said. \u201cI\u2019ll never forget the first time I went there.\u201d<\/p>\n