the faint aroma of desperation<\/a> emanating from athletic departments that just realized firing a coach now requires the GDP of a small Caribbean nation.<\/p>\nYes, football is back. And so is your Oracle of the Option, your Sultan of the Snap Count, your Prognosticator of Play-Action \u2013 the proficient, profound and occasionally preposterous Professor Pigskin.<\/p>\n
As always, Professor Pigskin will take questions from our studio audience. Please remember: No wagering on these predictions. Mainly because anyone who wagered on them last year is probably living in a storage unit.<\/p>\n
Studio Audience: Professor, what\u2019s the greatest rivalry in college football?<\/p>\n
Professor Pigskin: Forget Ohio State-Michigan and Alabama-Auburn. The greatest rivalry is the NCAA vs. the concept of eligibility.<\/p>\n
Every year the NCAA attempts to enforce some quaint little notion that college athletes are actually supposed to eventually leave college, while players, lawyers, boosters, collectives and pom-pom-waving local judges respond, \u201cNot so fast!\u201d<\/p>\n
At this rate, college football players are going to have more eligibility than Supreme Court justices. Pretty soon, we\u2019re going to see a 32-year-old quarterback introduced on Senior Day with his wife, three kids, mortgage broker and 401(k) advise<\/p>\n
SA: Does Mike Norvell save his job at Florida State?<\/p>\n
PP: Absolutely. Have you seen his buyout?<\/p>\n
Firing Norvell would require FSU to take out a second mortgage on Doak Campbell Stadium, sell Osceola\u2019s horse on Facebook Marketplace and start a GoFundMe called \u201cPlease Help Us Make Mike Go Away.\u201d<\/p>\n
Luckily, they won\u2019t need it. The Seminoles will rebound this season and make a run at the ACC championship.<\/p>\n
SA: What about Jon Sumrall in his first season at Florida?<\/p>\n
PP: Gator fans will be stunned when they discover their new coach occasionally makes decisions without consulting a laminated flow chart, three analysts and a 47-page feasibility study on whether to call timeout.<\/p>\n
Billy Napier built infrastructure. Lots of infrastructure. By the end, Florida\u2019s football staff had more employees than Disney World. Nobody knew exactly what they all did, but I\u2019m pretty sure there was an assistant director of assistant directors.<\/p>\n
Sumrall\u2019s revolutionary philosophy: Get good players. Coach them hard. Win games.<\/p>\n
Florida becomes one of the country\u2019s surprise teams and makes an unexpected run into the College Football Playoff. And somewhere, Napier will stare at his 14-page game-management spreadsheet and mutter, \u201cWhy didn\u2019t I think of that?\u201d<\/p>\n
SA: We\u2019re entering Scott Frost 2.0, Year 2 at UCF. What happens?<\/p>\n
PP: Hopefully Frost discovers a razor.<\/p>\n
Seriously, Frosty, you\u2019re the head coach at UCF, not the bass player in a Lynyrd Skynyrd tribute band playing Bike Week. Every time I see Frost with that scruffy beard, I expect him to hold up a cardboard sign reading: \u201cWILL CALL PLAYS FOR NIL MONEY.\u201d<\/p>\n
But quarterback Alonza Barnett will provide a spark, UCF finally makes some noise in the Big 12 and finishes 8-4.<\/p>\n
That\u2019s not 2017 Scott Frost, but Knights fans will gladly take it \u2013 as long as Frost 2.0 doesn\u2019t eventually become Nebraska 2.0.<\/p>\n
SA: What do you expect from the Jacksonville Jaguars?<\/p>\n
PP: The dress rehearsal for next year.<\/p>\n
The Jags will play in Orlando next season while their Jacksonville stadium gets a billion-dollar makeover, and they\u2019ll arrive in Central Florida as legitimate Super Bowl contenders. Trevor Lawrence and the Jags go 13-4 and advance to the AFC Championship Game.<\/p>\n
They won\u2019t quite reach the Super Bowl, but Orlando will probably start planning next year\u2019s championship parade anyway. And because it\u2019s Orlando, they\u2019ll charge $35 to park for it.<\/p>\n
SA: How about the Tampa Bay Buccaneers?<\/p>\n
PP: The Bucs have two major advantages: Baker Mayfield and the NFC South. Winning the NFC South is like being the best restaurant at an I-75 rest stop. Congratulations, but let\u2019s keep it in perspective.<\/p>\n
Baker\u2019s contract negotiations will continue, meaning every touchdown pass adds another waterfront mansion to his asking price.<\/p>\n
The Bucs go 9-8.<\/p>\n
In most divisions, that\u2019s mediocre.<\/p>\n
In the NFC South, that\u2019s a dynasty.<\/p>\n
SA: What happens with the Miami Dolphins?<\/p>\n
PP: Remember the perfect 1972 Dolphins?<\/p>\n
This year\u2019s Dolphins will honor them by doing the exact opposite. After cutting Tua Tagovailoa and taking a financial hit so painful their salary cap now requires FEMA assistance, Miami will achieve a different kind of perfection:<\/p>\n
0-17.<\/p>\n
The anti-\u201972 Dolphins.<\/p>\n
Instead of the surviving \u201972 Dolphins popping champagne when the last undefeated team loses, these Dolphins will pop a Walmart store-brand Sam\u2019s Choice Cola when the last winless team finally wins.<\/p>\n
SA: Wait a minute. You think the Dolphins will go 0-17, but you think the Miami Hurricanes are going to be good?<\/p>\n
PP: Good? The Canes will be great. I\u2019m talking NATIONAL CHAMPIONSHIP great!<\/p>\n
SA: Haven\u2019t you been predicting Miami will finally win the ACC for years? They\u2019ve been in the league since 2004 and still haven\u2019t won it.<\/p>\n
PP: Facts have never gotten in the way of a Professor Pigskin prediction before, and they\u2019re not starting now. Mark it down, Miami finally wins the ACC, storms through the College Football Playoff and wins the natty.<\/p>\n
South Florida will erupt, and thousands of Miami fans who haven\u2019t attended a home game since 2003 will immediately post on social media about how they\u2019ve \u201cbeen here through it all.\u201d<\/p>\n
SA: Professor, after predicting the Dolphins go winless and Miami wins it all, I\u2019m almost afraid to ask: Who wins the Super Bowl?<\/p>\n
PP: The Los Angeles Rams beat the Jacksonville Jaguars.<\/p>\n
SA: Wait. Didn\u2019t you just say Jacksonville loses in the AFC Championship Game?<\/p>\n
PP: Did I?<\/p>\n
SA: Yes. Five minutes ago.<\/p>\n
PP: As our president would say, \u201cFake news!\u201d This is what\u2019s wrong with journalism today. All this unnecessary fact-checking.<\/p>\n
Fine. The Jaguars will lose the AFC Championship Game, file an appeal and get a pom-pom-waving local judge to grant them additional postseason eligibility.<\/p>\n
Rams over Jaguars in the Super Bowl.<\/p>\n
Write it down.<\/p>\n
And if I\u2019m wrong, I\u2019ll do what every respected football expert does:<\/p>\n
Delete the post.<\/p>\n
SA: Before you go, Professor Piggy, how about your traditional Rodney Dangerfield public-service announcement?<\/p>\n
PP: Of course. For everyone attending games this fall: Tailgate responsibly. Don\u2019t overindulge. Never drink and drive.<\/p>\n
And remember the immortal Rodney, who posed for the cover of the Orlando Sentinel football preview in 2004 and told us:<\/p>\n
\u201cI drink way too much. The last time I gave a urine sample, it had an olive in it.\u201d<\/p>\n
Welcome back, football.<\/p>\n
Professor Pigskin has spoken.<\/p>\n
Email me at mbianchi@orlandosentinel.com. Hit me up on social media @BianchiWrites and listen to my radio show \u201cGame On\u201d every weekday from 3 to 6 p.m. on FM 96.9, AM 740 and 969TheGame.com\/listen.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"Ahhh, football season in Florida. You can smell it in the air: charcoal smoke drifting across stadium parking…\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":384494,"comment_status":"","ping_status":"","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[6],"tags":[8739,23741,1250,28,30,29,3603,3111,1630,7219],"class_list":["post-384493","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","category-florida","tag-bucs","tag-canes","tag-dolphins","tag-florida","tag-florida-headlines","tag-florida-news","tag-fsu","tag-gators","tag-jaguars","tag-ucf"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/us-fl\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/384493","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/us-fl\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/us-fl\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/us-fl\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/us-fl\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=384493"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/us-fl\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/384493\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/us-fl\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/384494"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/us-fl\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=384493"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/us-fl\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=384493"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/us-fl\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=384493"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}