Patrick Clancy admitted to having suicidal ideation after the tragic deaths of his three children.

“There was a time where I—I didn’t think I would live to see my 35th birthday,” Patrick, now 36, told 60 Minutes in an interview Sept. 20. “And I was completely fine with it.”

Patrick opened up the emotional toll the 2023 deaths of his children, Cora, 5, Dawson, 3 and Callan, 8 months, took on him. In a wide-ranging interview, he also discussed the first signs that his then-wife Lindsay Clancy was struggling with her mental health, how he honors his children’s memory and why he had to move to New York to start a fresh chapter with wife Rachel Danis.

Patrick Clancy Describes Holding Son Callan As He Died

Patrick described returning from running errands the night of January 24, 2023 to find Lindsay bleeding and partially paralyzed on the lawn, after cutting her neck and wrists and then leaping from a second-story window in an attempt to take her life. 

“I just saw blood everywhere,” he later testified, per ABC 13, “and the window was open.”

Inside, he found Cora and Dawson had been strangled to death.

Emergency responders were able to find a heartbeat for Callan, who was rushed to the hospital. 

“I really thought there was a chance that Callan would live,” Patrick recalled on 60 Minutes. “I remember just thinking, ‘Just gimme one. Just gimme one kid, and I would raise him as best I coud, and I would give him the best life I possibly could. I’d tell him about his brother and sister.’ And I was holdin’ out hope for that.” 

At the hospital, however, he said he saw the look on the doctor’s face and knew it wouldn’t be “a good prognosis.” 

For four days, Callan hung on before the baby ultimately succumbed to his injuries. 

“I’m so grateful for those four days that I had with him,” Patrick shared. “And I’m so grateful he hung on.”

RELATED: Patrick Clancy Reveals His and Lindsay Clancy’s Son Callan Died in His Arms

When asked what he told his son in the wake of the tragedy, Patrick replied, “I said, ‘I’m so sorry.’ And I got to—I got to hold him. I got to lay down next to him. And he died in my arms.”

Patrick—who has publicly forgiven Lindsay—said he asked his wife if she remembered killing the children.

“She said it was like a dream,” he said. “She remembered it much in the way you would remember a dream after waking up.”

Patrick Clancy Described Having Suicidal Ideation in Months After His Children’s Deaths

While Lindsay was facing murder charges, Patrick returned to a now eerily quiet life in Duxbury, Massachusetts.

“Everything just came to a screeching halt,” he told 60 Minutes. “Really without thinking, I drove by their school. And it was at the exact time that all of their friends were getting dropped off. And I was just, I couldn’t be there anymore.”

He admitted that he thought of taking his own life, but decided instead to move to New York City, where he could grieve in anonymity.

RELATED: Patrick Clancy’s Wife Rachel Danis Addresses Speculation About How They Really Met

In May 2023, he celebrated Callan’s first birthday by lighting a candle in St. Patrick’s Cathedral.

“I say, ‘I love you buddy.’ And I walk out on Fifth Avenue and start crying my eyes out,” he remembered. “And nobody cared.” 

How Did Patrick Clancy and Rachel Danis Meet?

In January 2024, Patrick met fertility specialist Rachel Danis at a running club and the two hit it off.

Patrick said Rachel helped him navigate his grief, telling 60 Minutes, “my life has changed since I met Rachel in such a positive way.”

The couple got married in April 2026 and shared with 60 Minutes that they are now starting a family together.

Patrick honored the memory of his three children with a specially designed playground in Duxbury, Mass. and has incorporated their favorite toys and mementos of their life into his Manhattan apartment. 

He admitted to still dreaming of the children he shared with Lindsay and told 60 Minutes they will never be far from his mind.

RELATED: Lindsay Clancy Holdout Juror Michael Desronvil Breaks Silence After Mistrial 

What Is Lindsay Clancy Accused Of?

Lindsay’s defense team has not denied that she killed the children, but has argued that she was suffering from postpartum psychosis and is therefore not guilty by reason of insanity. Her first trial ended in a mistrial Sept. 4.

Lindsay—now facing a possible retrial—is slated to be back in court for a new hearing on Sept. 29.