As I noted in last week’s column, Capitalize Albany, the city’s economic development arm, is keeping the proposals it received for the Parking Lot District a secret. Heck, it won’t even say how many proposals were submitted.

Fortunately, I have a few ideas of my own that I’m more than happy to share. Call them conversation starters, if you will, or attempts to get the ball rolling on the long-planned but forever-stalled remake of the mostly blank eight-acre site near MVP Arena. Ready? Here goes.

The Albany Canalaquarium

Some people want to build canals downtown. Others want an aquarium. Who says we have to choose? That’s right, I’m proposing a string of canals stocked with exotic fish and mammals.

Just imagine the thrill of walking alongside a downtown waterway while a shark feeds nearby. Hey, is that an octopus on the sidewalk? Don’t get too close to the water, kids. Piranha!

I suppose some of the canals will need to be heated to fend off the upstate winter, as there’s nothing like dead fish to kill a tourism vibe. A few canals could feature glass tops, allowing visitors to stand above and peer into the teeming menagerie below. No city in the world would have anything like it. We’re talking instant attraction.

The world’s largest parking garage

Albany is reported to have the world’s largest Walmart, which, of course, is a massive civic honor. But that doesn’t mean we can’t add another superlative, and nothing could be more perfect for the Parking Lot District than a massive, multistory parking garage.

Hey, is there anywhere to park in this town? Oh, you bet there is.

How big will it need to be? Well, it will take some research to ensure ours is truly the largest, but I’m imagining a structure that’s at least 10 stories high and fills every inch of the available acreage. And that’s not all: The top floor will feature a small prison where we’ll keep anyone who dares to gripe about not enough parking in downtown Albany.

A Hard Rock Cafe

Hard Rock Cafes are still cool, right? Of course they are! So let’s build one in the PLD, also known as Liberty Park, subsidized with a massive tax subsidy.

The memorabilia in this particular Hard Rock will have an upstate rock-and-roll theme. Oh, look! There’s a replica of the car Sammy Hagar was driving when he was pulled over on the Northway, inspiring his 1984 hit “I Can’t Drive 55!” And there’s …

Alas, I can’t think of anything else, which may be a problem. So let’s build an ESPN Zone next door and fill it with memorabilia from defunct Capital Region sports franchises. Tell me you wouldn’t fork over hard-earned cash to eat nachos while gazing at the River Rats jersey worn by goalie Jean-Francois Damphousse during the team’s memorable 1998-99 season.

I mean, who wouldn’t?

The Cuomo Almost-Presidential Library

Presidential libraries are a dime a dozen these days, and, let’s be honest, they’re boring as dirt. But no city has a museum devoted entirely to two men who were thought to be presidential but never got to the White House.

I’m talking, of course, about Mario and Andrew Cuomo, the 52nd and 56th governors of New York, neither of whom ran for president despite rampant speculation to the contrary.

Mario, the father, could never quite pull the trigger on a campaign, as evidenced by the chartered plane to New Hampshire that he left waiting at the Albany airport in 1992. (The plane will be rebuilt in the library, of course.) Andrew, the son, was undone by the scandals that prematurely ended his third term. (They’ll make for interesting exhibits!)

Presidential libraries usually have an archival component, and this one will have an entire wing filled with articles from pundits who vowed that one Cuomo or the other was a lock-solid guarantee to be president. Future researchers will marvel at the silliness.

An engaging neighborhood

Let’s shelve the grand ideas and instead build a walkable, human-scaled neighborhood with a mix of apartments, restaurants and stores.

I’m talking about a place where you could live and work without hopping in a car, a neighborhood, without flashy architecture, that resembles how we built cities before micro-managing planners and attention-seeking politicians got in the way. A truly urban neighborhood that lacks “attractions” but is just an enjoyable place to spend time.

Ha! Kidding! Obviously, nobody would ever want something like that. So, about that Canalaquarium. Who’s in?

This article originally published at Churchill: Ideas for downtown Albany? Oh, I’ve got a few..