You Can’t Keep A Good Drag Queen Down!
Season 18
Episode 1
Editor’s Rating
4 stars
****
A cast full of experienced queens makes for an exciting premiere and a promising start to the season.
Photo: WOWPresents via YouTube
Hey, that was … pretty good, right?
Eighteen seasons into RuPaul’s Drag Race, with untold amounts of All Stars, international, and Vs. The World seasons in between, the judges, the audiences, and the viewers well know the show’s formula. In its years on the air, Drag Race has gone from basement production to coolest show around to Emmys darling to, now, old stalwart that’s showing her age. That the finale is no longer being held in a large-scale theater remains a sad, low-budget choice. RuPaul is not the energetic host she once was. Classic challenges like the talent show and Snatch Game have had diminishing returns. Most annoyingly, recent casts have tended to be too young, largely because the show wants to discover young talent and then track their growth through All-Star seasons, rather than introducing fully-formed queens.
I wouldn’t go so far as to say that the season 18 premiere is a total revitalization of the show, but there’s a lot to be excited about in this first episode. Most notably, the cast comprises respected professionals. The oldest queen on season 17 was Lexi Love, who was referred to as “grandma” while being 32 — this year, that age would be entirely uninteresting. The show goes out of its way to emphasize that the cast is full of queens in their 30s, and, if Wikipedia is to be believed, of the six queens in their 20s, four are 29. There are also multiple queens with national reputations in the bunch, and even the so-called “bedroom queen” has stage experience. It’s an accomplished group.
And, in a choice that bodes well for the production decisions this season, this group of professional performers is promptly thrown out of whack when the first challenge of the season is not a talent show or a girl group challenge like it has been since season 12. Instead, the show cast a slew of girls with tons of performing experience, then made them all make an outfit out of bullshit. Tasking them with the drag on a dime challenge early on did two great things: Gave us lots of time in the Werk Room to get to know the girls, and forced this confident group of queens who arrived with thousands of dollars worth of costumes to go back to the basics. By the end of the episode, two wildly confident queens were taken down a notch, one girl everyone was discounting rose, and at least one contestant demonstrated an insecurity-based personality flaw the size of Texas. That’s how Drag Race works best!
So let’s run through the girls:
The first queen into the Werk Room is Athena Dion, whose entrance line is “Honey, this is how you throw a party on Drag Race, bitch.” Bookending a sentence with both “honey” and “bitch” is very descriptive of Athena’s larger aesthetic: Polished, very draggy, but without a hint of modernity. She’s Morphine Love Dion’s mother, and she’s been applying to this show for 14 seasons, which means she takes the competition very seriously. The good things about Athena are that she’s not afraid of a fight (she later goes toe-to-toe with Briar Blush over basically nothing) and she’s clearly a professional entertainer with no fear of being on stage. Unfortunately, every confessional she gives in the episode sounds like she’s reading a script, which I find difficult to listen to, and her makeup is pretty harsh. She’s not a seamstress, but she took sewing classes before the show, and her drag on a dime is totally serviceable. I didn’t love the shape of the skirt, but there’s no way I would have put her in the bottom.
Next up is Kenya Pleaser, who is a total ball of energy who began her career as a Lizzo impersonator. The mini-challenge this week is not a challenge in any real way. Instead, RuPaul and Jamal Sims watch as half-naked Sleep No More cast-offs surround each queen one by one while they scream. In other words, the challenge is to entertain RuPaul on a stage with nothing to help you. Kenya wins it because she could be entertaining in any situation imaginable. Unfortunately, what she cannot do is make a garment out of unconventional materials. She totally flops at the challenge and will enter next week as an underdog. Still, counting her out would be a total mistake, since all this does is give one of the most fun queens in the bunch a clear storyline.
Then it’s Nini Coco, a twink from Denver whose entrance line is “gayyyy!” Here’s my truth: Like the rest of the queens, I discounted Nini Coco from the moment she showed up. By the end of the episode, I learned that this was a mistake. Her logline is that she’s a mechanical engineer by day who makes all her own drag, but she doesn’t immediately present as particularly distinctive. But then, in the drag-on-a-dime challenge, she makes her look entirely out of gift bags, á la LaLa Ri, which is smart since it gives the outfit an immediate hook, given LaLa’s famous failure. And I gotta give it to her: It’s a structurally impressive look that stands out in a sea of fabric-based garments. The visible bra in the back is admittedly a little ugly, but the overall outfit is fabulous and bright. I love the matching orange center lash. Smart girl.
The best-named queen of the season, Jane Don’t, is next. Thus far, Jane is my winner pick. Bosco and Irene the Alien’s sister, Jane is acid-tongued, stylish, and funny. She’s not a villain, but she’s clearly not scared of confrontation, and her Schiaperelli-esque entrance look is a stunner. On the runway, she puts together a pastel, green-and-pink skirt suit that is both ugly and fabulous. Clearly, she’s got a real eye for fashion, and her makeup is stunning. I have nothing bad to say about Jane’s run this week. Watch out for this one.
Discord Addams enters the Werk Room next, and oh boy, is the show about to have fun bullying her. She’s a “punk” queen from St. Petersburg (née Chicago, but the real-life drama there remains unclear to me). Between the episode and Untucked, the editors go out of their way to consistently undermine Discord, throwing her under the bus at every chance they get. To be fair, she gives them a lot to work with. Discord is over-confident to the max, getting angry that she’s safe, asking Cardi B why she wasn’t in the top, and making fun of Nini’s outfit in Untucked. I can’t yet tell if she wants to be the villain, or if she just can’t help herself. Her outfit on the runway is fun, but during her presentation, the editors cut out the music to give Michelle and Ru a chance to point and laugh at Discord’s clunky walk. It’s terribly mean and also very funny.
After Discord comes our third Florida queen, Mia Starr. Crazy to think that just three seasons ago, Malaysia Babydoll Foxx was the first-ever Florida queen, and now the show has five girls from Florida on the same season. Clearly, the casting department has fallen out of love with New York, which used to be their biggest pool. Anyway, Mia is a professional dancer who worked on Rihanna’s Loud Tour, danced in JLo’s Super Bowl performance, and played the male lead in Camila Cabello’s “Havana” video. Now, she’s here to be the star on her own. Her outfit on the runway is a decorated corset, but she ekes through to the safe zone, which honestly bodes poorly for her since, if the show was more invested in her, they would have used this opportunity to have her meet the judges. I like Mia fine so far, but I’m really just excited to see what happens when she gets a performance challenge.
DD Fuego enters the Werk Room next. The sole New York girl this year, DD is totally fine but doesn’t have a great first episode. She’s polished and sweet but doesn’t do anything to define herself yet. Part of the problem is that she mostly describes herself with what she’s not: “I am originally from Monterrey, Mexico,” she tells the other girls. “I am Latina, but I’m not like a ‘cha, cha, cha.’” I get wanting to separate yourself from previous Drag Race archetypes, but you need to then fill the gap with something else. DD hasn’t done that yet. Her rainbow-and-tinfoil outfit on the runway is another one that is just barely safe.
Next in is Juicy Love Dion, Morphine’s daughter and Athena’s granddaughter — though the show just calls her Athena’s “daughter,” so as not to make Athena feel too old. Her too-long entrance line is “The party princess of Miami and Mykonos is finally here! Yes, baby, the Juice is loose.” That is so many words! Just say “The Juice is loose!” Either way, I love this girl immediately. Fabulous and gorgeous, her wide-set eyes make her addictive to watch on stage and she moves like a dream. She ends up in the bottom over her ugly skirt, which is totally fair, but I think it also bodes well for her overall, since it gives her facetime with the judges. DD or Mia could very easily have been in the “not bottom two” slot to get them more screentime, but instead the judges met Juicy. Combine her impending underdog narrative with the inevitable mother-daughter rivalry, and the fact that she’s the youngest in the cast (at 24), and you have three separate storylines while other queens are struggling for one. I think she’s in it for the long haul.
Then it’s Vita VonTesse Starr, who is from Montgomery, Alabama, and is not, as far as we know, drag family with Mia Starr, despite their shared last name. Vita is an experienced pageant queen who enters with the kind of too-long entrance line that I actually love: “Baby it’s easy to see / That I’m the key / You can question those other girls / But never Queen V.” For those keeping track, that rhyme scheme is AABA (how very “Stopping by the Woods on a Snowy Evening”). Vita has the best runway look of the episode by a mile, made of black and white umbrellas with disco ball detailing. If she can tell jokes as well as she sews, she’s a lock for the finale.
Boston queen Briar Blush enters next. She has my favorite entrance line of the episode (“WHY ARE YOU RECORDING ME?”), but she’s potentially trying too hard to be the villain. After her entrance, she walks up to the girls and says, “Meh!” It’s very “my Bostonian friend Plane had a method for getting screentime that I will now use as well.” However, after the entrances finished, I grew to like Briar. At the end of her near-incomprehensible spat with Athena over some gloves (?), she looks directly into the camera and asks, “Where does she get off?” Made me spit out my drink. Her runway outfit is a sparkly pink cat outfit that is near the top of the safe pile but is deservedly not critiqued.
After Briar’s bitchiness, the sweetest queen of the season, Mandy Mango, enters the building. Mandy is adorable, quirky, super kind, and, from what we’ve seen thus far, not ready for the competition. She works as a nurse in real life, and her entrance outfit is a nurse outfit. Her makeup is not at the level of the other girls in the room, and she is thus far a little meek. Her outfit on the runway is a burlap dress with an interesting shape, but she accessorizes it in ways that show astoundingly bad instincts. Flowers are pasted all over it, seemingly at random, and strings of them fall off the hem in an unappetizing way. Still, if there was a person on this cast that I’d like to know most, it’s Mandy, who seems like an utter delight.
Next in is Ciara Myst, a queen I’m having trouble connecting with. She’s a spooky queen with VFX makeup experience. But I’m not a person who particularly loves Salem, Massachusetts, and, in terms of horror, Ciara’s drag seems more Hocus Pocus than The Witch. It’s definitely a style, and she does it well, but her drag is just not my thing. On the runway, she gives X-Men’s Mystique. The tights don’t match the blue of the facepaint, but they’re well-made. She’s deservedly safe. I could see a world where Ciara is dulling herself down for Drag Race, but I’m hoping she gets a lot more freaky and a lot less “Spirit Halloween” moving forward.
Then, Darlene Mitchell enters the Werk Room. Darlene bills herself as a bedroom queen, but she performed for years in Los Angeles under the name Trash before getting sober and staying home. She’s a midwest-themed girl, who likes to be trashy and campy. She seems savvier and funnier than she lets on, and she has the most interesting face of the whole bunch. Clearly, I’m a big Darlene fan. On the runway, she puts together a nightie minidress that shows off her freakishly long legs. It’s well styled and she looks gorgeous — the dark horse of the competition.
Finally, it’s Myki Meeks, a.k.a. the fifth Florida queen of the year. Myki is cute, silly, and sweet, and bills herself as the hosting queen of Orlando. But she doesn’t do a lot to set herself apart from the pack this week. Her entrance outfit is purple velour and it looks fine. Her runway look is blue and beige and it also looks fine. Clearly, she’s waiting for some comedy challenges to show off her chops, and I’ll hold off judgment until we get to see her in her element.
Nobody goes home this week, but Ru still declares Kenya and Mandy the bottom two, saving Juicy. Instead, it’s a top-two lip sync between Nini and Vita, with third-placer Jane called safe. The song is guest judge Cardi B’s “Enough,” and the lip sync does not go the way I expected. It’s a really big ask of the top girls: Both probably knew that they weren’t going home, so they might not have spent a lot of time learning the lyrics, which is tough because there are a lot of words. Still, Vita, whom I presumed would beat Nini without breaking a sweat, really does not know that rap, and she also can’t move very well in her outfit. White-twink-from-Denver Nini may not be suited to the track, but she knows every intricacy of the lyrics, and she gives a clear performance that gains energy and confidence as she goes along. That means that, ultimately, Nini Coco wins the first lip sync and thus the challenge. I was shocked! But it’s good for the season to have some unpredictability, and it’s even better for the season that Discord is going to get really riled up. The best compliment I can give this season so far? I’m really looking forward to seeing how this plays out next week.
• Discord complains about Nini being in the top basically all episode, while other queens like Jane try to kindly not get down in the mud with her. Cardi comes backstage and is super sweet. I thought it was great that she gave her queer wig and makeup girls a chance to talk about their connection to the show. Discord asks Cardi to compliment her outfit, and it’s awkward. Juicy sobs into Athena’s arms, and Kenya freaks out about potentially having to lip sync against Juicy.
• Cardi was a fabulous guest judge. She was game, gave real critiques, and wasn’t afraid to be harsh. Let it not be forgotten that Cardi started her career on reality TV and still knows how to give a show. My favorite line: “It looked like she had a time at Michael’s.”
• Funniest single word of the episode: RuPaul calling Mandy Mango just “Mango.”
• My meanest and most nitpicky critique of the week: Nini Coco should have shaved her arms.
• Trauma Makeup Corner: Nothing during the makeup section of the episode, but Jane cries on the runway over her relationship with her father, who taught her how to sew. Honestly, this seemed entirely natural and unprompted by production to me, just a case of a queen being overwhelmed with emotion after a high-stress few days. It’s nice when this stuff is unforced and it’s even nicer that we won’t have to worry about Jane getting a “vulnerability” critique later down the line.
• Gay Thoughts from Gay People: My boyfriend and I did a draft of this season’s queens. The person whose team has the best average placement wins (with bonus points for choosing the winner). Here are the teams, listed alphabetically. Who has the better crew?
Me: Briar Blush, Jane Don’t, Kenya Pleaser, Mandy Mango, Myki Meeks, Nini Coco, and Vita VonTesse Starr
Boyfriend: Athena Dion, Ciara Myst, Darlene Mitchell, DD Fuego, Discord Addams, Juicy Love Dion, Mia Starr
• Predicted Top Four: It’s really early, but I’m gonna predict: Jane Don’t, Vita VonTesse Starr, Juicy Love Dion, and (just on instinct) Darlene Mitchell. Spoilers are Kenya Pleaser, Athena Dion, and Nini Coco.
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