Dear Abby:
My 25th class reunion is coming up, and I’m debating whether to go because I’m not sure how to handle a conversation that is sure to come up. I was very close to my classmates until five years ago, when my husband and I faced a series of family tragedies that took all of my time and energy. The worst was losing a daughter who would have been graduating this year.
I’m ready to reconnect with my old friends, but how do I deal with casual conversations without making light of the situation or being a wet blanket? If someone asks, “How is your daughter doing?” I need to have a reasonable response that isn’t going to be awful for both of us. The thought of having to talk about it makes me want to stay home. Advice?
—Undecided in Los Angeles
Dear Undecided:
Please accept my sympathy for the loss of your daughter. If someone at the reunion hasn’t already heard about her death and asks how she’s doing, respond with the truth, which is that she passed away several years ago. If someone asks for the details, simply say you don’t want to discuss it further and change the subject.