This column originally appeared in Looped In NYC, our weekly newsletter for where to go and what to know.
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The clearest sign that my early 20s were over was when I went from never getting hangovers to getting them regularly. And that’s when I really began to consider: Am I drinking because I actually want to or because it’s so ingrained in our social norms?
Since moving to New York City, most of my socialization has centered around alcohol. Catching up with friends usually happened at a bar, and countless birthday parties and housewarmings seemed to call for popping open the bottle to toast the guest of honor.
Not only do I feel exhausted the next day, but buying drinks is EXPENSIVE. Now, when I go out, I ask myself: “Am I really in the mood to drink tonight or am I just doing it out of habit? And if not, where can I hang out with my friends after dinner?”
Recently, more options have popped up around the city for the sober-curious. So my colleague Emily Nadal and I checked out two sober bars: No More Cafe in the East Village and Mockingbird in Park Slope.
While the sober bars we visited had a very nice ambience, I don’t crave mocktails. As a coffee lover, I prefer late-night cafes. Personally, what I value more are late-night spaces to hang with friends and get to know people in your community without the pressure to spend a lot of money.
So I spoke with Jean Sebastian Serena, who hosts substance-free dance parties called Zero Proof NY.
As Gen Zers, we bonded over how we think the recent reports attributing Gen Z’s obsession with health to why younger people are drinking less might be exaggerated. He told me he thinks younger people are drinking less because we’re just more broke as a generation, and some of us have just found other ways to have fun.
And to him, a sober party is really just like any other party.
“My 11th-grade masquerade ball was some of the most fun I had in my adolescence, and there was not a lick of alcohol anywhere,” Serena said. “Clearly, we were capable of enjoying ourselves without it, so what changed?”
Sam Bail, who hosts alcohol-free nighttime events, also runs a Substack called Bright Nights Social, where she curates a list of alcohol-free nightlife events in the city, like live jazz, sober dance parties and library after hours.
In conclusion: There is space for sober nightlife here. It’s just smaller.
Want to see more of the sober bar scene? Check out our video on Instagram, TikTok or YouTube.