ROCHESTER, N.Y. — As youth violence continues to rise across several cities in New York state, the importance of having a stable home and healthy relationship is a huge factor that can play into that.

What You Need To Know

As youth violence continues to rise across several cities in New York state, the importance of having a stable home and healthy relationship is a huge factor that can play into that

One program is bringing fathers together to reflect on the hardship, challenges and even mistakes they have made in the past

The organization ‘Fatherhood Connection’ mission goes beyond the classroom as they provide a new path through its program, changing hundreds of lives

“We’re trying to break legacy, break patterns of hurt, patterns of neglect, patterns of just not having a sense of who they are,” Fatherhood Connection executive director and founder Reggie Cox said. “Being able to talk about that, to affirm, approve and celebrate that child is important today. I feel like that continues, especially with all the youth violence that the fathers are absent in many cases. I mean, I think that media doesn’t show enough, though, about the fathers who are there. And I think that we need to capture that today. You’re going to capture, hopefully, some of the men that are there and striving to be there.”

Inspired by his own struggles, the founder, Reggie Cox, started the group ‘Fatherhood Connection’ over 25 years ago.

“Growing up, I want it to be connected with my father,” Reggie Cox said. “And at that time, he’s my hero today, right? But that time, he wasn’t. I was seeking to be had that relationship with them and by me yearning to have that relationship, that sense of belonging. I was always striving to get it and didn’t have it. I realized after he got clean from alcoholism and all that stuff, he was my hero. But with that came that exposure to not having validation, affirmation, celebration.”

“I wasn’t the only one that had this issue from this fatherlessness,” Reggie Cox said. “I need to identify, validate [and] process my emotions so I can be able to bring a difference that my dad maybe didn’t give me so I can establish the model and start a legacy.”

Working right alongside Reggie is his son, program manager Ishmael.

“It’s a blessing to have my father not only lead the charge but also be a servant of the charge,” Ishmael Cox said. “He has been a huge advocate for this type of work. Of course, with the amount of time he’s placed in this. I think it’s been awesome because we use this term or this phrase, intergenerational healing. So, although my dad’s is the CEO and the founder, he’s also so amazing because he’s open to still hear from a 31-year-old, you know, the baby boy of the family. And I believe it just really represents, you know, what a man should look like, that we should not just get stuck in our ways or how we see a thing, but always remain a learner. So that’s been great to see that.”

They are helping improve the bonds between others, and even amongst their own family.

“I’ve been thinking about my own problems and solutions and goals,” Ishmael Cox said. “When a group like this really shows me that, hey, like, it’s more than just about you. There has been times where the emotional connection may have not been there, but I believe it’s been stronger than ever because of groups like this where we’re able to be open and transparent and just be vulnerable as men, and knowing that we’re not going to be judged for that vulnerability.”

However, the mission here goes beyond this classroom. They hope their efforts and support can grow.

“We launched in 2010, but I was doing fatherhood work ever since 1997,” Reggie Cox said. “It’s time to pass the baton to my sons [and] other young people. Let them carry on now. I think the most important thing is how do we brainstorm to keep this alive? Cause we have seen the progression and the success. How do we be able to, look at other, other institutions that work with families? Not just the mother, right. But the whole family with the father being included in that family. We have referrals. We have not only referrals, references across the state of what we’re doing- great work but where’s the funders?”

“I can give you a laundry list of things that I’ve learned, but the thing that has been one thing that’s always anchored me with these Father Connection groups is that, hey, it’s just so much bigger than you. And if you can continue to think like that, [you] will be able to create great and lasting change, knowing that there are men, just fathers just like you,” Ishmael Cox said. “Father figures just like you, who are needing an outlet, just like you.”

Fatherhood Connection will continue its meetings every Tuesday from 6- 8 p.m., starting back on Aug. 4.