This column originally appeared in the Looped In NYC newsletter. Sign up here.
Like in Cuffing Seasons past, a single New Yorker could once again scroll the apps or hit the dance floor or approach attractive coeds on the subway.
But a new method for finding a significant other has arrived in New York City: niche, interest-driven and in-person dating events, like eating extremely spicy food across from an eligible stranger.
My fellow Looped In producer Elizabeth Shwe recently stopped by Spiciest Supper Club, a speed-dating event at MáLà Project, to determine if this is, indeed, the hot new way to find love.
Watch this week’s video — and read her recap below.
James: Is there a connection between hot food and romance … or is it just tasty?
Elizabeth: I’d argue yes because it’s easier to bond with a stranger over really good food.
Like many Chinese dishes, dry pot is meant to be shared family style. “Especially for Asians, being able to eat together is a really important part about our identity,” co-founder Julie Zhu said, and she wanted to replicate that intimacy in her dating events.
Leilany Chan, who helps organize the Spiciest Supper Club, said she thinks mala dry pot is the perfect first date to go on because you can customize the ingredients together and figure out what the other person likes and dislikes.
“To know someone’s tolerance of spice is kind of fun. Like if you’re choking over mild spice, you might be like, “Oh, damn, like I guess we don’t really match,’” she said.
The Spiciest Supper Club also has a more intentional feel to it than traditional speed dating events. Each table of 4 has 30 minutes to talk, and there are 3 rotations throughout the night. There’s also a card game at each table that’s full of deep questions, so Zhu is prioritizing the quality of connections rather than the quantity.
James: How’d it go? Was this a “the journey is the destination” event, or did some people come away with a win? Are there other in-person dating events Looped In singles should check out?
Elizabeth: At the end of the night, there were three mutual matches out of 32 people. I did see a lot of Instagram profile swapping, so maybe more couples that didn’t officially match with each other went out on date afterwards.
Everyone I talked with said they were tired of the dating apps, so they were mainly just relieved to be meeting potential romantic partners in real life.
Participant Maggie Wang told me someone she recently went on a date with lied about their height by 4 inches on their dating profile, so both thought it was time to try something new.
What I found is that there are more dating events now that are, unlike traditional speed dating events, more intentional, curated and catered towards younger people who have dating app fatigue. According to Eventbrite, events that explicitly use “meet-cute” language have grown 117% in the first half of 2026. This makes sense with the general trend of people wanting to cut back on their phone usage this year too.
Here are others dating events single New Yorkers can check out:
Take2: I love this concept. Basically you sign up to date the same group of people twice … and you’re not allowed to get each other’s first and last name to prevent people from looking each other up and making assumptions. Joyce Hasa, the founder of Take2, told me the idea is that the second time around, people are more confident, less judgmental, and more open to connecting with people that they might have written off the first time.Astoria Trash Club has a singles event open to 21-plus of all sexual orientations. Pick up trash and shoot your shot?Friends and Lovers regularly has singles partiesLectures on Tap is technically not a dating event, but it’s somewhere you can have a romantic spark with someone over a lecture.Sofar Sounds Singles NightHave no plans on Halloweekend? Maybe you can find your boo and hereHave a bookshop meet cute storyHave a fear of strangers? You can meet someone who has been vetted by at least one person!Sober singles trivia night at Nook cafe in BushwickSpeed dating at Lately Cafe Bar & BistroNow this is really creative: Any single new dog parents anybody?Not exactly a dating event but Queer Panic encourages you to meet someone new and dance together
James: I know that people told you the dating scene these days is “exhausting,” “chaotic” and “draining,” but we’re not going to end on that note. We’re going to end on a note of triumph and positivity. So please give us one.
Elizabeth: Totally. The people who I met were actually pretty open-minded. Wang said in her years of dating in the city, she’s learned to not turn someone down so fast based on just one thing you don’t like. You have to remember there are layers to people and nobody’s perfect.
Here are other quick tips for single New Yorkers who have dating app fatigue:
Hasa, the founder of Take2, suggests making eye contact and smiling with strangers whether you’re walking on the street, sitting on the subway or the bar. It can really go a long way and improve your confidence, especially during a time when everyone’s on their phones with headphones in.Hasa also recommends straight up telling your friends that you’re single and want to meet someone and telling them what you’re looking for. Also a lot more of her friends are throwing these single matchmaking parties, so maybe you can pressure your friends to host those too.And don’t expect so much on a first date. There are more people bringing “checklists” to first dates, which can take the romance out of it. “I don’t think you should expect someone to give you princess treatment on the first date, and rub your feet or something. Like, it’s just super weird to expect that from somebody who doesn’t even know you.” Chan said.