College is a time that is full of change. You move multiple times over the span of four years, always meeting new people and trying new things, but the biggest change can come after you graduate. It can be especially challenging when you are considering moving away from your support system.
It is a big decision to choose where you are going to live, so it is important that you go somewhere that is beneficial to your career and independence the most. You cannot base this major decision on someone else — choose your next step in life for yourself.
Taking the next step after college and moving away from the people who have been your family during university is difficult, which is true for both platonic and romantic relationships. Choosing yourself does not mean breaking up with your college sweetheart or ending a friendship; it means understanding that your 20s are a time when you need to take your own life path into consideration.
Joshua Olivares and his girlfriend Marla David have been together since the summer before their freshman year at UT. Since graduating in 2025, they have been in a long-distance relationship where they balance their careers, relationship and independence.
“I feel like in college … we were (together) a lot of times, but now … it’s good for us to make experiences and friends outside of just each other’s group,” Olivares said. “My thing for myself, and my thing for her is try to meet as many people as you can, make friends, connections, grow as a person, and then it’ll be beneficial in the long run, even when we’re back without long distance anymore.”
The human brain does not stop developing until your mid-to-late 20s. It is a period where you will change as a person. According to a report by the National Library of Medicine, settling down too early can lead to a higher chance of divorce later on. Waiting to get married doesn’t mean you are giving up on your relationship, it just means you are trying to figure out your life before you commit it to someone else.
In many cases, being in a long-distance relationship for a period of time after graduation can make your relationship stronger, and it isn’t something that you should be scared of. People always say that distance makes the heart grow fonder, and this can prove true when you are entering a new stage in life.
“Long distance, it’s definitely helped us,” David said. “I think it just helped us grow stronger and we can be independent without each other, but also when we’re together, it just makes the time more memorable.”
Leaving the college bubble and building your life can be terrifying, and it can be good to have another person to rely on and make it easier. But, you owe it to yourself to find your own independence and happiness outside of relationships. When you choose where to go after throwing your cap at graduation, it has to be a decision you make for yourself, not another person.
Healy is a journalism junior from San Antonio, Texas.