If you’ve lived in Lubbock long enough, you know there are two guarantees in life: the wind will destroy at least one fence a year, and your kid will eventually beg for a pet you absolutely do not want. Maybe you already caved on that turtle your child “had to have” back in 2010 and are now wondering how it’s still alive. Well…hold onto your hat, because researchers say the next pet craze could be something far worse.
Raccoons. That’s right. And let me tell you from personal experience–raccoons are the BANE OF MY EXISTENCE! I live at Buffalo Springs Lake and they’re EVERYWHERE out there! They knock over my trashcans, annoy my dogs, and–interestingly–buddy up to my outdoor cats. I guess they team up for shenanigans at night when I’m sleeping. Anyway…
Yes, Raccoons Are Getting Cuter–And That’s the Problem
According to a new study from the University of Arkansas, raccoons are physically evolving because of how often they’re around humans. And by “evolving,” they don’t mean they’re becoming better behaved or less likely to empty your dumpster at 2am They mean their faces are getting cuter.
That’s right–the masked bandits that tip over your trash in the middle of the night are developing softer features, bigger eyes, and a look that might one day trigger your kid to say, “Mom, can we KEEP it?”
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One biologist explains it like this: once wild animals spend enough time near people, they become less afraid and start showing “domestication syndrome.” Think softer faces…but the same bad attitude.
Foxes and mice in urban areas are showing the same trend. Great. When the raccoons aren’t trying to get into your garage, the foxes might be sitting outside looking adorable enough to cause chaos inside your household.
Lubbock, Let’s Not Start a Trend
Before someone in Lubbock tries to come at you with their “Emotional Support Raccoon,” let’s be clear: these animals make terrible pets.
Not “a little difficult,” not “high maintenance”–terrible.
They’re destructive, they require tons of space, they have unpredictable behavior, and they carry diseases your family does NOT need. And in many places–including parts of Texas–it’s flat-out illegal to keep a raccoon as a pet without special permits.
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Just because they’re starting to look like something you’d see on a cute fall-themed throw pillow at HomeGoods doesn’t mean you want one in your living room.
The South Plains Already Has Enough Wildlife
Between prairie dogs, skunks, coyotes, and whatever keeps digging up flower beds around the Hub City, we’re already busy enough. The last thing we need is a new wave of adorable-looking raccoons convincing kids they deserve a spot on the couch.
So if your child comes home from school someday insisting their class learned that raccoons are “basically pets now,” remember: their faces might be evolving…but their habits definitely aren’t.
Lubbock, admire them from afar–preferably far far.
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Gallery Credit: Landon King
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Gallery Credit: Dairy Queen