Growing up in Lubbock in the 90s, we had a very specific definition of “fancy.”

If it glittered, glowed, spun, or cost more than $4.99 at Mervyn’s, we were convinced it belonged in a mansion. We were kids raised on Safety City field trips, McDonald’s birthday parties, and South Plains Mall glamour.

Our bar for luxury was…uniquely West Texan…and if I’m honest, quite low…

Let’s look back at the things we were 100% sure were peak sophistication, but definitely were not.

Photo by Toa Heftiba on Unsplash1. Red Lobster: The Pinnacle of Fine Dining

If your folks took you to Red Lobster, you were basically royalty. You got all dressed up in your church clothes, practiced your best manners, and ordered shrimp scampi like you had a fully stocked 401 (k) plan.

Photo by Markus Spiske on Unsplash2. Big Soft Pretzels From Target

Target wasn’t just “shopping” for us ’90s kids, it was a dang outing. That warm, overly salted pretzel from the fancy little cafe at the front of the store? That was Paris. That was friggin’ Milan. That was the most luxurious carbohydrate experience we could imagine. Bonus points if your mom caved and bought you an ICEE, too.

Photo by Kier in Sight Archives on Unsplash3. Bedazzled Anything

Jeans. Belts. Hats. Shirts. You name it. If it had rhinestones, it was designer-level shmancy garb. Every Lubbock kid grew up thinking that owning a Bedazzler was essentially the same thing as having a degree in fashion somewhere in New York. Meanwhile, we were all walking around looking like rejected members of S Club 7. We thought we were stunning, and we rocked the hell out of it.

Photo by Martin Engel on Unsplash4. A Bedroom With A Lava Lamp

If your friend had a Lava Lamp, they were rich as all get out. A lava lamp meant that their parents didn’t shop exclusively at Kmart. It was peak vibes. It was wealth. It was everything to us. In reality, it was probably $10 on sale at Spencer’s.

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Photo by Francesca Petroni on Unsplash5. The South Plains Mall Carousel Ride

This wasn’t just entertainment. The little fiberglass horse ride at the mall meant elegance. You felt like a princess (or prince) while perched upon that thing, ignoring your mom yelling, “HOLD ON!” from the side. You didn’t need her advice. You were straight up livin’.

Photo by Neli Cerquetella on Unsplash6. Owning a TV/VCR Combo

This was basically the flex of the decade. If your TV had a VCR in it, you had some damn Elon Musk technology going on. And, if you had your own, in your bedroom? That was some gated community sh*t right there.

Photo by Laura Chouette on Unsplash7. Sparkling Grape Juice on New Year’s Eve

Nothing said “classy” like you and your 8-year-old pals pretending to be wasted on New Year’s Eve, passing around a plastic bottle of sparkling Welch’s. Spoiler alert: they were like $3.49.

Photo by Josh Eckstein on Unsplash8. The Giant Crayola Box With The Sharpener

If you had the massive 64-pack Crayola box with the built-in sharpener, you were the queen/king of the classroom, y’all. You weren’t just coloring. You were curating museum-level masterpieces. Nobody cared that the sharpener only kind of worked. Who had time for that?

9. A Bedroom Phone (Especially a Clear One, and Your Own Phone Line)

Those see-through phones with neon wires and flashing lights were the fanciest things we could imagine. Beverly Hills. MTV Cribs. You believed your pal with one was leading a double life as a pop star. The truth is, every ’90s kid in Lubbock had one because they were $12 at Hastings.

Photo by Raphaël Biscaldi on Unsplash10. A Backyard Above-Ground Pool

We thought this was peak luxury. A pool in your own yard??? Holy smokes! Never mind the water was always freezing, full of june bugs, and had had a rough spot that always seemed to scrape your toe. Ballin’.

We were delusional, but it was beautiful. Looking back, our idea of “fancy” was pretty adorable. It didn’t take a whole lot to impress us. All you needed was a trip to Red Lobster, a lava lamp, and a novelty phone, and honestly, that’s what made growing up in Lubbock magical. We turned ordinary things into absolute glamour. That’s what made us fun.

Truthfully, I still fan-girl over all of that junk today…

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