Illustration by Lillian Durand
There are several signs that may indicate an unhealthy relationship, including patterns of disrespect and controlling behavior.
UTA’s Relationship Violence and Sexual Prevention program offers a space for the UTA community to report incidents of sexual and relationship violence. The program also holds prevention training and awareness programs to educate the community on the topic.
About 71% of women in intimate relationships on college campuses reported experiencing some form of intimate partner violence, according to a 2022 study from the National Criminal Justice Association.
Sydney Moreland, assistant director of the Relationship Violence and Sexual Assault Prevention program, said the signs aren’t always obvious at first, but some may be more apparent, like manipulation and gaslighting.
“It just means that there’s not that trust and support and that safety that a person needs in a relationship,” she said.
Moreland said to look out for signs of physical and sexual abuse, such as hitting, unwanted touching and sexual pressure. She also pointed out deeper signs, like one person making all the decisions and dismissing their partner’s needs, or one person making the other doubt themselves and their memory.
“The abuser creates tension, and the survivor’s stress builds, and then the incident occurs, whether that’s physical, verbal, psychological,” she said.
“Then there’s the reconciliation, and then you’re back to that like honeymoon period. It’s hard to break, because there is that calm, there is that love for the other individual,” Moreland said.
She said to aim for respect, trust and support in any relationship through both parties encouraging each other’s goals and practicing open communication.
“Disagreements can happen, but they’re handled with care and there’s no intimidation or manipulation,” Moreland said. “And then equality: Each person has the right to make their own decisions and responsibilities are shared. And then safety is a big one, that you’re feeling comfortable being yourself without the fear of judgment or harm.”
She said many students come to her saying they don’t feel comfortable being themselves with their partner, which she considers a red flag.
Moreland said she recommends meeting with a confidential advocate within the program, such as herself, if someone suspects they’re in an unhealthy relationship. UTA community members can also meet with a program advocate on behalf of someone they believe may need help.
“We try to do our best to help and point [students] in the right direction, to get support and the resources that they need,” she said.
Katharine Esser with the Women’s Center of Tarrant County said the center offers an option outside of UTA to seek help when dealing with an unhealthy relationship. The center focuses on issues of consent, how to build healthy relationships and protective factors with sexual assault, she said.
“It’s important that people know there are multiple resources, and everybody should be trauma-informed and on the same page of helping to believe survivors, get access to resources and start that healing process,” Esser said.
Moreland acknowledged that leaving an unhealthy relationship can have a lot of risks, but emphasized freedom as a main benefit of leaving.
“You’re choosing what happens with your life,” she said. “You’re in control of your money, you’re in control of your own decisions. I think that’s a big benefit.”
Associate news editor Taylor Sansom contributed to this article.
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