Two weeks ago, I went from thinking I had a basic stomach flu to discovering my gallbladder was secretly trying to assassinate me.<\/p>\n
Two weeks ago\u00a0Friday, I thought I was just wrestling with a nasty stomach flu \u2014 you know, the classic \u201ccoming out of both ends\u201d special. After a couple days of that carnival ride, the fun leveled up: my throat started convulsing nonstop, basically vagus-nerve fireworks masquerading as hiccups. Try not to puke sixty times an hour and tell me how Zen you feel. I muscled through the weekend before finally tapping out and going to the doctor on Monday. The meds they gave me barely touched the issue, and by Wednesday, the clinic took one look at me and said, \u201cYeah\u2026 you\u2019re going to the hospital.\u201d<\/p>\n
I landed\u00a0in Mercy 10 at Covenant*, it was tests, tubes, IVs, scopes, scans \u2014 every gadget they could plug into me. They eventually figured out my gallbladder wasn\u2019t working. Their official medical term: \u201cnon-functional gallbladder.\u201d My unofficial term: it looked like a busted Rain Bird sprinkler spraying pus and bile in every direction. They removed it and put in a temporary plastic stent to help drain the mess. Oh, and my gal bladderd poisoned my blood on the way out of the door.<\/p>\n
I actually started improving and was almost released, but my liver numbers crashed again. Because of that setback, they wheeled me back in and replaced the plastic stent with a steel one that\u2019ll ride shotgun inside me for about six weeks. Not dangerous \u2014 just unpleasant, weird, and a little too \u201ccyborg chic\u201d for my taste.<\/p>\n
Through it all, I\u2019ve tried to stay positive \u2014 even when I lost a tooth cap minutes before they told me I needed a drain. Even when the drainage tube in my side felt like fire made of sandpaper. Even when my vision blurred and my brain ran at half-speed from Dilaudid and Robitussin. I\u2019ve kept flirting with the nurses, keeping my spirits up, and reminding myself of a bit of Stoic wisdom: the obstacle is the way. Behind every mountain is another mountain, and the only move is to keep climbing.<\/p>\n