On an Irish personal finance forum on Reddit last month, a parent wanted to know what other mums and dads felt was the most expensive stage of having children. With a two-year-old and another baby on the way, the online poster was trying to find out if there was light at the end of the tunnel, in terms of hefty monthly costs.
They already spend €800 a month on childcare and their savings only amount to €3,000. What does the road ahead look like, the user asked. What kind of savings are needed for future costs, such as secondary school and college?
What followed was a warts-and-all discussion around the “never-ending” costs of raising a child. The online debate highlighted the ongoing struggles for so many parents across Ireland.
Those with young children and living in Dublin wrote about annual childcare costs ranging from €12,000 to €16,000. Parents outside the capital fret about how much would be needed to send their children to college. Those with children in secondary school face costs of around €5,000 a year to cover fees, voluntary school contributions, technology, extracurricular activities and school trips.
Another reckoned the tunnel is even longer in the current housing crisis, with adult children now in their 20s still living at home because rents are unaffordable.
It is clear, from this discussion and others like it, that many parents continue to feel the financial burden of raising a child in Ireland after secondary- or third-level education is finished.
In an era where peers flaunt branded clothing at school, it is natural to feel sympathy for parents struggling to just get by. Summer comes with an expectation of camps and a family holiday abroad. Later in life, many believe the college experience should open a door to independent living and socialising.
After college, there’s the daily grind to find a job. Any job.
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“I know it’s really hard,” read one person’s response. They said paying for all the costs can feel like “pedalling so hard to keep your head above water”.
A lot has happened in Ireland’s economic landscape even since insurer Laya Life published its Cradle to College Cost Index last May. That report found that the cost of raising a child from birth up to the age of 21 had increased dramatically over the decade to 2025.
The total cost to the average household was just shy of €322,000 for those first 21 years, Laya said. This breaks down to €15,324.20 a year, up 39 per cent in a decade.
Food, nappies, baby formula, pocket money and rent supports were among the biggest increases in child costs. The field work was undertaken in February, 2025, with 1,000 respondents who had children aged 21 or younger. If the same exercise is under way this month for an updated release later this year, will any of these expenses feel less crippling?
Carmel Green, a financial services expert at David Kelleher Financial Services in Kanturk, Co Cork, doesn’t think so.
“We hear that headline inflation growth has eased but the cost of living has gone nowhere,” she said. “I’m at the other end of the table, with children aged 18 and 20, and in the short term, costs don’t seem to be any easier.
“My 20-year-old is in his first year in university and for his accommodation alone, it would have cost €10,000. Because we’re a 40-minute drive away, it was cheaper to get him driving lessons and a car.
“On top of that, he works part-time, so his college experience isn’t what it should be. He doesn’t have those years of being around classmates, going out after college, socialising and enjoying the time there. He’s commuting and working and just making sure he can get through the years ahead of him.”
[ Stay-at-home parent role now valued at more than €60,000 a yearOpens in new window ]
Green said she feels she is in a privileged position in that it’s a two-parent working household, while her profession is focused on minding money, investing properly and budgeting. But her financial situation only improved during Covid when the business went online and she began taking on clients beyond Cork. She remembers being that parent wondering if money can be found for a school expense.
“I was that person living pay cheque to pay cheque. It’s something I’m very conscious of with clients who live like this at the moment, because I remember the worry over whether I could afford toys or how much school was costing. And the school hand was out constantly. There was always something that had to be paid to them.”
Even putting food on the table is an ongoing anxiety for many. Food-price inflation remains one of the biggest expenses for households after years of increases in the staples like bread, milk, cereals and pasta. This is blamed on geopolitical events such as the war in Ukraine, climate change and knock-on effects of hikes within supply chains.
Recent data from Worldpanel by Numerator shows grocery-price inflation increased from 6.25 per cent to 6.82 per cent over the 12 weeks to January 25th. Shoppers spent €1.2 billion as sales by retailers rose 5 per cent over that period, which included Christmas.
“The cost of day-to-day items is a concern,” said Green. “And when you’re in the middle of what you can and can’t afford, it’s a very scary place to be.
“I have a friend who has just had a baby and she was deciding whether she would breastfeed or use baby formula. In the end, it didn’t come down to choice. Baby formula was simply too expensive to start buying, so she’s breastfeeding. That’s not what you should be thinking about when you have a new baby. You shouldn’t have to ask yourself if you can afford to feed that child.”
Green believes taking out income protection insurance and starting a college fund early are two key elements of financial planning that every parent should act on. She also believes financial literacy and an understanding of how to budget are essential, even when it seems impossible against monthly childcare fees, mortgage repayments or rental costs.
“Children give you the most amazing life but trying to give them the best in Ireland is expensive. You must go into this phase of your life with your eyes open and my best advice would be to start planning for college.
“I don’t care if it’s only €10 or €20 a month that you can put away. Just do it. Those college years will come upon you very quickly and my big regret is that I didn’t practice what I’m preaching now, because I wasn’t in a position to save. So even the smallest amount and a habit of putting that by will make a big difference and you’ll start to see it grow.
“There is always going to be an unexpected expense that needs to be met too. I had a dishwasher and washing machine break down over Christmas and the costs of fixing those two appliances had to be met.
“I’m not talking about fancy investments or stocks. It’s about knowing what is coming in, what is going out and finding that place where savings can be made. And I understand that, for so many, when all that is done, there is nothing left over.
“But trust me, the way to get to the bottom of it in the absence of supports is to take ownership of your spending. Protect your income as well, so you are covered if you can’t work and the mortgage still needs to be paid, and keep an eye on your child’s expenses right through to college.”
After ample advice from the online community and shared experiences of the most expensive stages of childhood, the original Reddit poster has come to decision: “I think my conclusion is once they reach school age, maintain paying, say 80 per cent, of the childcare costs into an account for child expenses and keep the reminder for the irregular but predictable costs of a teenager and college.”
“Godspeed, friend,” another poster replies.