MADISON, Wis. — While most of us know we should say no, ask for the raise or push back in the meeting, Madison’s own Kelly Ehlers says doing it without feeling guilty afterward is often the hard part.
Ehlers is a Madison native who sat down with Weekend Morning Anchor Michelle Renee Quinn to share that you don’t have to become a harder person to go after what you deserve.
Her new book, Nice Girls Win: How Kind Women Can Create the Lives They Deserve, topped the Amazon book charts on its release.
Ehlers says the secret is setting boundaries.
“So one thing I talk about in the book is the invisible contracts that you never signed. So think about during your day all the things you’re doing to people please, to be the nice girl, not to upset people,” she said. “But you never agreed to it, all of those things that we never signed up for, that we’re just going through the motions.”
Ehlers encourages women to rip up that invisible contract. “With this book, I want to shake women awake to say, hey, we don’t need to go through the motions anymore. We can think about what we actually deserve in life.”
She said we’ve been lied to about the word nice and that “being nice, combined with data and strategy in high emotional intelligence can be lethal.”
Ehlers encourages women to turn back into their original self by asking, “What are your beliefs? How do you want to show up for people?”
“Rip up those invisible contracts….We’re having boundaries and we’re saying no and turning back into ourselves,” Ehlers said.
If you’re interested in reading Nice Girls Win, it’s currently available on Amazon and at nicegirlswin.com.
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