![](\"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/us\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/03\/fddd4ca69738c44d027e38cb35dec9df2f-southerncharm-ep14.rsquare.w400.png\")
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Southern Charm<\/a><\/p>\n About Last Night<\/p>\n \n Season 11<\/p>\n Episode 14\n <\/p>\n \n Editor\u2019s Rating<\/p>\n 2 stars<\/p>\n **\n <\/p>\n \n Photo: Bravo\n <\/p>\n This was always bound to happen. If Salley had been patient, Craig would have one of his inevitable blowups, and Charley would have gotten the ick faster than Rodrigo logs onto Ticketmaster when Madonna announces a new tour. The episode starts just as the last episode ends<\/a>, with a drunken Craig raging against the machine, except the machine doesn\u2019t exist, or the machine is Salley, whom he keeps calling a loser for no reason. He then sits and mopes for the rest of the ride back to the resort as Salley sheds a few errant tears (but sadly not her extra E) and Austen tells her not to waste her tears on Craig, that he doesn\u2019t deserve them.<\/p>\n When they dislodge from the vans and skitter into the night like cockroaches looking to get away from a predator (do cockroaches have predators?), Charley says that she saw Craig raging \u201cfor no reason,\u201d and is shaking her head. This is something she repeats later, saying that when she\u2019s seen him blow up in the past, like at Austen during Whitner\u2019s literary-themed dinner<\/a>, that something set him off. Here, she was scared that it appeared out of the night air, that it was just unbridled anger firing in every direction like someone activated a Pikachu.<\/p>\n The question is then, what is Charley, whose romantic connection with Craig was blossoming until now, going to do? Molly points out what someone should have told both Salley and Venita earlier this season: that people are always going to offer advice, and there are going to be those people who say, \u201cLet me find out for myself.\u201d Charley, it seems, has found out and, inverting the common idiom, this happened even before they fucked around. Phew. When Charley joins Molly and Venita for some resort yoga, the easiest variety of yoga, Molly asks Charley what is up with their romance. Charley says that it\u2019s not a thing. Oh, thank the Catholic Jesus. I always say this show is about men behaving terribly and the women who excuse them, and I\u2019m glad that Charley isn\u2019t making any excuses for Craig. She got one good look at what lay underneath the hood, shook her head, and quickly departed.<\/p>\n Wait, does that mean Salley is going to want to get back in there? Just kidding. Definitely not. They\u2019re all exasperated by Craig. Well, everyone except for Shep. He still knocks on Craig\u2019s door to see if he wants to go fishing and Craig doesn\u2019t answer. Then Shep leaps into bed with Austen, practically spooning him and draping his legs over the big muppet. What\u2019s up with guys always wanting to leap into bed with Austen? Is he like every straight guy\u2019s Bravo crush? Is he the Ryan Reynolds of basic cable (and the next day on Peacock)?<\/p>\n Shep, as usual, is on the wrong side of history with this one. He says that he feels bad for Craig and knows what Craig feels like. Yes, I have a feeling that Shephard Rose fully understands what it\u2019s like to get blackout drunk, say terrible things, and then wake up feeling like a dog shit smoothie and not knowing why everyone is mad at him. Because of that, Shep doesn\u2019t want to pile onto Craig. Austen says that maybe the person he should feel bad for is Salley, since Craig screamed at her for an entire car ride.<\/p>\n Shep\u2019s whole premise is that he knows Craig already feels terrible and doesn\u2019t want to make it worse. He relates a story about when he got kicked out of boarding school his senior year, his mother arrived to help him pack his things, and said she wasn\u2019t going to say anything because nothing she said would make him feel as bad as he already made himself feel. The problem is, Craig doesn\u2019t feel bad! Austen says, \u201cCraig doesn\u2019t have a conscience, so I don\u2019t see him feeling bad.\u201d<\/p>\n When Craig finally wakes up at 3:19 p.m. (tell us that is not true and a trick the editors played on us) and meets Whitney for a poolside lunch, Whitney tells him that he should apologize. Craig asks, \u201cFor what?\u201d See. Craig doesn\u2019t care. He says that he\u2019s \u201cperfectly imperfect,\u201d which I think is a sentiment to embrace about certain things \u2014\u00a0not being able to focus, not drinking as much water as you should, always being 10 minutes late to appointments \u2014\u00a0but not an entire anger management issue. Craig says, \u201cCool, I messed up once in two years. My bad.\u201d But this is a pattern of behavior that impacts everyone around and comes with no consequences for Craig. As Whitner points out to Shep, he doesn\u2019t face any consequences for these blowups, so he has no incentive to stop. Someone has to tell him that it\u2019s unacceptable. This isn\u2019t a slip-up; it\u2019s more like a relapse, and if an alcoholic had such a relapse, they would be back at their meetings, doing the work, starting over again at building something. Craig, instead, is choosing to ignore it.<\/p>\n That\u2019s sort of what everyone does as they go for a day of mystical healing thanks to Shep, who wants to recreate his ayahuasca journey, but it seems like Bravo won\u2019t let him. Why not? Can\u2019t we dose all of these clowns with ayahuasca and get them barfing, hallucinating, and changing their lives on television? If Chelsea Handler can do it<\/a>, why can\u2019t Austen Kroll? Instead, they arrive and get cleansed by smoke, even Whitney would says he hates hippies and that incense, reiki, and crystals have no effect in the real world. I would agree with Whitney, I think they\u2019re bullshit, but they also can work \u2026 just like astrology, praying, and peptides work because people think they do, so they will it to work, they use it to justify changes and then imbue it with meaning when really the only thing that worked was the belief, the extra motivation, the shove towards improvement.<\/p>\n At the end of the episode, everyone gathers in a circle and drinks something that looks like hot chocolate but doesn\u2019t seem to be mind-altering. Shep is pissed. He wanted everyone to get fucked up, talk to their great, great-grandfathers in the shape of a reptile spirit paddling by the swim-up bar, and leave full of love. Instead, they got something not even as potent as two sips of Four Loko. The ceremony ends with everyone seated in a circle as lightning crashes, and an old mother cries<\/a>, to quote the worst song from the \u201890s. They all worry that they have angered the gods, and they have. They set it right when they go inside to escape the rain, and they all wander around in the room with their eyes closed, finding partners at random and connecting with them. How ironic when Venita and Craig open their eyes and find each other, only to dismiss the other just as quickly. It ends with Craig holding hands with Austen as their energy passes back and forth in a loop that\u2019s like forgiveness. Then Craig gets a long embrace from Shep, their hearts beating together, their breath syncing, as if these two haven\u2019t been on the same page since this reality experiment started all those years ago.<\/p>\n