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\n Illustration: Margalit Cutler\n <\/p>\n
You may know Kareem Rahma from riding the subway<\/a>, but he spent the past week in a lot of cars. He was chauffeured (for the first time ever) around the city for Brandcast, YouTube\u2019s massive upfront presentation, and finally premiered his new series, Keep the Meter Running<\/a>, which follows New York City cabdrivers to their favorite spots. Rahma chose to produce the series independently but still hosted a lavish premiere at Metrograph along with an after-party at Boom. He then immediately packed his bags and drove to his Connecticut country house, where he goes to preserve some level of normalcy. \u201cAll my neighbors are old, and they have no idea who I am,\u201d he says. \u201cThey don\u2019t have a take.\u201d Throughout one of the most eventful weeks of his life, Rahma comforted himself with many burgers (medium and medium rare), morning lollipops with his daughter, and his new favorite beverage: Guinness.<\/p>\n Tuesday, May 12 We make coffee in this thing called a Moccamaster. It\u2019s like a pour-over except it\u2019s a machine that does the pour-over for you. I used to make a real pour-over every morning, but with the baby, I no longer have time. Karina drinks an oatmeal-caramel concoction, which I find disturbing. I\u2019ve been into coffee since I lived in Minneapolis. I was early on what they used to call third-wave coffee. I like either the most normal thing in the world, which is bodega coffee, or a really great cup of coffee. I don\u2019t like anything in the middle. At night, I\u2019m thinking about the coffee I\u2019m going to have the next day. I normally have two cups, but today I have an early call time, so I am out the door after just one.<\/p>\n I head to the dress rehearsal for YouTube Brandcast at Lincoln Center. It\u2019s total Birdman-band vibes. Everyone with clipboards, it\u2019s a massive production. I\u2019m shocked. I really need another cup of coffee, and they\u2019re like, \u201cYou have to go do soundcheck.\u201d I don\u2019t want to be a diva, so I say it\u2019s fine, but internally I\u2019m grumpy.<\/p>\n After another shoot, I get lunch at Dudleys<\/a> with my manager and assistant. I\u2019m really craving a burger, but I just tried on a suit for Brandcast, and it\u2019s a little tight. I keep saying out loud, \u201cI really want the burger, but I\u2019m fat. I really want the burger, but I\u2019m fat.\u201d My manager says, \u201cWhat if we split the burger and split a Cobb salad?\u201d I say, \u201cThat\u2019s great. That\u2019s just enough fatness.\u201d<\/p>\n Later, I stop by my office for a nap. I wanted an office after we had the baby because I was working from home and the kid was too distracting. I have a detached garage I used to work in with the door open, but my baby would often come outside to play. I live in South Slope, and it was starting to feel like, I don\u2019t live in New York, I live in Park Slope. So I got a place in Manhattan. It used to be a Chinatown dental facility on the fifth floor. Some of the offices still have sinks in them, which works out for the person next door to me, who cuts hair. Mine is a corner unit with windows on all sides, the size of a bedroom, hence the nap.<\/p>\n I head to a YouTube press shindig with Trevor Noah and Cleo Abram. The production values at these are always amazing. Everyone is really organized and buttoned up. Usually, in my life, that is not the case at all. I have handlers. It\u2019s the first time in my life I feel famous.<\/p>\n After the event, I get dinner at Minetta Tavern<\/a> with the fellas: Jeremy Zimmer, the former CEO of United Talent Agency; Michael Green and Reza Izad, who run Underscore Talent; and Adam Faze, the producer of Keep the Meter Running. Jeremy and Michael are next-door neighbors. Adam is very close with Jeremy, I\u2019m very close with Michael, so we\u2019re all connected and regularly do this little fellas\u2019 dinner. Because I picked Minetta, I have the honor of ordering starters. Two bone marrows \u2014 way too much, four sticks per plate, and there are five of us, but to my surprise, all of it is eaten. Crab salad, which I think is a new menu item. Steak frites because it\u2019s simple and wonderful. I used to order medium rare and found people were going too rare, so I switched to medium. It\u2019s because of this new category called \u201cmedium plus.\u201d It\u2019s a little over medium but not well done, which is disgusting. I do not condone medium plus. This one comes out medium rare in the good way. I get two Negronis as well.<\/p>\n Wednesday, May 13 My call time for Brandcast is 1:15, so the car picks me up an hour before. I make the big mistake of wearing the suit instead of carrying it because I wanted to be hands free. Amateur move.<\/p>\n Lunch is a weird crafty meal during our second dress rehearsal \u2014 chicken with red sauce on top of rice, fat potatoes (wedges, basically, which I hate) \u2014 and an assortment of fruit. The fruit is great. Saves my life. I alternate between my coffee, Diet Coke, and Celsius. I prefer orange but the non-carbonated one.<\/p>\n We do another dress rehearsal, then I sit in the greenroom for a while, letting my suit wrinkle some more. I have a really great 30-minute one-on-one with Alex Cooper. I\u2019ve never met her before, and I go up and say, \u201cHey, Alex, my name\u2019s Kareem, how are you?\u201d She says, \u201cFine, how are you?\u201d \u2014 she doesn\u2019t really recognize me. I tell her I host a show called Subway Takes, and she says, \u201cOh my God, I love that show.\u201d I\u2019m a Daddy Gang\u2013er now.<\/p>\n The red carpet starts at 5:30. By the time I\u2019m getting photographed, my whole suit is wrinkled. I find my shirt is also wrinkled, and I didn\u2019t like the shirt to begin with. I call Adam, who is about to pick up his own suit at Paul Smith, and say, \u201cI know Paul Smith makes things for skinny people, but if they have any shirts in 2XL, buy them for me and I\u2019ll pay you back.\u201d He drops off two shirts for me on the red carpet. I go to the bathroom and try them on \u2014\u00a0they\u2019re both too small. A Paul Smith 2XL fits like a large. I end up walking the red carpet holding a Paul Smith bag.<\/p>\n Brandcast goes super well. Chappell Roan performs. It\u2019s crazy to do 14 hours of prep, plus all the emails and texts and calls, and I\u2019m onstage for four minutes. There\u2019s a big party at the same place after. I stay for about an hour and a half, make the rounds. I don\u2019t eat the passed apps. I\u2019m saving myself because I know I want a little late-night meal.<\/p>\n Adam and I end up going to Blue Ribbon Brasserie<\/a>. I order another burger \u2014 I actually order it medium rare this time. Adam gets a burger too. We order frites for the table. I\u2019m not even that hungry, but I need to wind down. It\u2019s nice and cozy and surprisingly not busy at 11 p.m.<\/p>\n Thursday, May 14\u00a0 I\u2019m pretty sure I have gym clothes at my office \u2014 usually I do because I just joined\u00a0Equinox, which is right near it \u2014 but today my gym clothes aren\u2019t there. So I come up with a plan: I recently got an email saying I had a $250 credit at the Equinox store. I figure I\u2019ll just go use my credit at Equinox and then work out in those clothes. I bike over and get there at 11:15. Turns out the store closes at 11 and reopens at like four or five. I\u2019m faced with a very tough decision: I can either go back to my office or just work out in my outfit for my premiere tonight. I decide to work out \u2014 black tee, black denim, Doc Martens. I only lift weights, so I don\u2019t really get sweaty.<\/p>\n Later, I get a breakfast sandwich at Little Canal<\/a>. Super simple: bread, cheese, egg, avocado. It\u2019s great. Breakfast sandwiches are fantastic and underrated and should be eaten any time of day. That\u2019s how my wife and I connected on Hinge. There was that prompt \u201cHit me up if you like \u2026,\u201d and we both said \u201cbreakfast for dinner.\u201d We go to diners a lot and have breakfast for dinner \u2014 7th Avenue Donuts & Diner<\/a> in Park Slope is our spot. We had our third date there.<\/p>\n I head back to the office to fuck around and wait. Adam comes in to steam his suit. My assistant, Madyson, comes in. People use my office as a hub. Doors at Metrograph<\/a> open at 6:30 for the premiere, and I don\u2019t want to arrive exactly on time. So I go to Clandestino<\/a> for half an hour by myself to have a pint of Guinness. I just went to Ireland and am newly obsessed. A friend walks in, then another friend. Then Jeremy Zimmer walks in, and I\u2019m like, \u201cWhat the hell are you doing here?\u201d He\u2019s sober and 65 years old. He says, \u201cOh, I\u2019m just here to take a piss. I rode a silver Citi Bike for the first time from uptown.\u201d More and more people keep showing up. I didn\u2019t tell anyone I\u2019d be there, but word got out. Suddenly, it\u2019s 7:15 and somebody comes in and says, \u201cMetrograph is really popping.\u201d So I head over, and it is indeed fucking popping.<\/p>\n The premiere is the best night of my life \u2014 truly. It\u2019s so much fun, and the fucking crowd is perfect. And then obviously watching the show on the big screen hits different. I didn\u2019t plan on staying for the actual screening, but I end up watching both episodes from the back of the room with Adam. I get really emotional and start crying at the end. So does he. It just goes by so fast.<\/p>\n Ramy Youssef does the Q&A after the screening. He has been supportive of the show since day one \u2014 he watched early cuts, we had planning meetings with him, just talking about the series and what it should say. He had this really great tip where he was like, \u201cIf anything feels off or boring ever, just make it more personal.\u201d That was his overall note, not just about the show but about everything.\u00a0We also bring up the cabbies featured in the show. I\u2019m surprised so many of them are able to come. Their families come too; they\u2019re all so proud of their dads. John McDonagh, one of the cabbies featured in the show, says, \u201cI used to drop people off at these parties, and now I\u2019m the star.\u201d<\/p>\n I wasn\u2019t planning on going to the after-party. I don\u2019t like after-parties at all. In fact, I told everyone we didn\u2019t need an after-party. The screening at Metrograph was all I ever wanted. The worst part of a wedding is the dancing. Why do people need another wedding after their wedding? You should get married, have dinner with everyone, maybe a little cocktail hour, and then everyone should go home. I was like, \u201cNo one\u2019s going to come. We\u2019re going to walk in, and there\u2019s going to be 50 people in this huge room.\u201d Then I\u2019m finally like, \u201cYou know what? I\u2019ll go.\u201d<\/p>\n I\u2019m shocked when I walk into Boom<\/a>. I can\u2019t believe it. No. 1, I\u2019m like, \u201cWho are these people?\u201d because I don\u2019t know a lot of them, but I\u2019m so happy they\u2019re there.<\/p>\n
I wake up, I look at my child, and I give her a big fat hug. I have the same breakfast every single day, which is one soft-boiled egg, an assortment of cheeses \u2014 Swiss, Gouda, something fancy and expensive \u2014 and half an avocado. Sometimes there\u2019s a little labneh or hummus, some chopped tomatoes on the side, some feta. It\u2019s like a modern-day meze platter. My wife, Karina, is usually up a half-hour before me, already chopping things up.<\/p>\n
Same exact breakfast at home. Two cups of coffee. Luckily, I have a later call time, so I get to have a lazier morning. I play with the kid, and when the nanny comes, I start steaming my clothes. I\u2019ve been doing so much press that I\u2019ve run out of clothes \u2014\u00a0I can\u2019t repeat an outfit. So I recently used up some J.Crew credit on two suits, but I sent the wrong link for one of them and got a baby-blue suit instead of green, which means today I have to wear an old gray houndstooth suit.<\/p>\n
Same breakfast \u2014 soft-boiled egg, avocado, cheese, two cups of coffee \u2014 plus a lollipop. I\u2019ve introduced my daughter to lollipops, and it\u2019s adorable. The first thing she says to me that morning is \u201clollipop.\u201d I say, \u201cWhat color?\u201d She says, \u201cRed.\u201d Then, \u201cBaba lollipop.\u201d (Baba is how you say \u201cdad\u201d in Arabic.)\u00a0I say, \u201cI don\u2019t want a lollipop right now.\u201d Then, \u201cBaba baba baba blue.\u201d So I have a blue Dum-Dum. I don\u2019t love it, but it\u2019s also hard not to enjoy a lollipop.<\/p>\n