In the quest for one protein bar to rule them all, none have dominated quite like the David Protein bar. The company claims to have created “the most protein-dense bar in existence.” Each bar boasts 28 grams of protein, zero sugar, and just 150 calories—75 percent of which come from protein. By their metrics, that is about 30 percent more, on average, compared to other popular protein bars from Built, Quest, and Barebells. The secret sauce? A plant-based fat replacer called EPG, manufactured by the company Epogee and the subject of even more discourse after David Protein purchased Epogee earlier this year.
With their near-perfect macros, it’s easy to see why the protein-pilled among us (e.g. Andrew Huberman) are buying what David is selling. But how do they actually taste?
I tracked down all ten flavors—including the latest, limited-edition Pumpkin Spice—to conduct the ultimate post-workout taste-test.
Note: You may have seen the recent Consumer Reports story about lead in protein powders. There have not been any similar tests on protein bars, and David Protein was not mentioned in the Consumer Reports story, though the brand to-date does not have a protein powder offering.
David Protein Bar Flavors From Worst to Best
It’s cod.
The first time I bit into David’s Blueberry Pie, I thought it might be my new favorite protein bar. The flavor hits your tongue immediately and tastes shockingly like an actual pie. But halfway through, I wanted to finish it less and less. Most of David’s flavor profiles are relatively subtle—except Blueberry Pie. This one really hits you over the head. While blueberry fans might appreciate that, it’s too sickly-sweet for my liking.
David’s autumnal offering has a distinct pumpkin aroma, which feels, at the very least, festive. In terms of flavor, however, it tastes like the way that a HomeGoods smells. Whether that statement fills you with existential dread or excitement is probably a good barometer for if it’s worth you checking this one out.
Nothing can replicate the creaminess of real peanut butter, which is notably absent here. This is no Reese’s. That said, it’s not the most synthetic rendition of this flavor pairing that I’ve encountered in the protein-verse. David’s entry in the category is not at all inoffensive.
Eating this made me realize I don’t really know what red velvet is supposed to taste like. And don’t try to tell me it’s just chocolate with food dye, it’s different! I wouldn’t say that David’s take on the controversial baked good tastes much like any red velvet cake I’ve ever had. But even so, I like this bar! And while it’s probably not a flavor I would ever specifically seek out (especially since I still don’t know what flavor this is), I certainly wouldn’t be upset if someone gave it to me.
The majority of peanut butter-flavored protein bars are really rich and heavy (think: MET-Rx’s Peanut Butter Cup, Pure Protein’s Chocolate Peanut Butter, or One’s Reese’s Peanut Butter Lovers bars). Not so with this one. It’s actually quite smooth and doesn’t leave an overwhelming aftertaste. While all David Bars are a bit salty, this is definitely the saltiest. And of the lineup’s two PB options, this one is best.
Who doesn’t like Funfetti? A sweeter offering, this one takes you back to every childhood birthday party. Maybe it’s the pull of nostalgia, or maybe it’s the illusion of an indulgent treat. Either way, I’m a big fan.
There was a time when the ultimate post-gym hack was to take Quest’s brownie-flavored bar and microwave it until it tasted almost like an actual brownie. Doing that with David’s imitation-brownie is, by my account, even better. Just be careful with timing—six to eight seconds should do it. 10 is pushing it. 15 seconds, and you’re going to have a very dry brownie.
Perhaps the smoothest of all. There’s a surprising lightness for something that calls itself a “Cinnamon Roll.” Actually, Cinnamon Doughnut might be a more apt name. It tastes more like something you’d want to pair with a crisp apple cider, versus a sticky Cinnabon roll from the mall.
Who doesn’t love cookie dough? Especially cookie dough with chocolate chips. I find nearly all David bars have a soft and sticky cookie dough-like consistency, which obviously fits this flavor perfectly. Maybe I’m compensating for early childhood cookie-dough deprivation—my mother refused to let me steal a scoop of raw batter when she was baking (she strictly forbade raw egg consumption)—but I find myself reaching for this bar time and time again, and now no one can stop me.
Final Judgement
Given the nutritional breakdown, it would be fair to assume David bars taste like cardboard. They don’t. The fact that they’ve created such flavorful options with so few calories and zero sugar might actually be more impressive than their insane macros. And while not every single bar here is something I’d personally reach for, there really isn’t anything gag-worthy in their lineup. Well, except for the cod. But again, it’s cod.